


@RealSpidey570360BC02C1a5664D7

by Polkadot4946



Category: Black Panther (2018), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: African Politics, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anxiety, Avengers - Freeform, Ben Parker Dies, Ben Parker was a journalist, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, May Parker (Spider-Man) & Tony Stark Coparenting Peter Parker, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Has a Family, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter's parents had been to Wakanda, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sensory Overload, Stark Industries intern, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Twitter, Wakanda, Whump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-12
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:40:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21773104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polkadot4946/pseuds/Polkadot4946
Summary: The one year anniversary of Ben Parker's death is only a week away when T'Challa and Shuri arrive at the compound. A week of stress and grief is mixed with a new science partner and Tony's meetings around the new Avengers international laws. May finally begins meeting some of the Avengers, and Shuri tries to figure out what numbers at the end of the Spiderman Twitter handle stand for.The story is told amidst one shots of Peter, Ben, and May's lives before the week occured.
Relationships: Ben Parker & Peter Parker, Ben Parker/May Parker (Spider-Man), Mary Parker & Peter Parker & Richard Parker, May Parker (Spider-Man) & Peter Parker, May Parker (Spider-Man) & Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Shuri, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, richard parker/mary parker
Comments: 7
Kudos: 123





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warning: Grief and Mourning
> 
> Thanks for reading, take care of yourself!  
> (more notes at the end)

ONE WEEK BEFORE THE ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF BEN'S DEATH

Thursdays in the summer were always fun for Peter. He spent the morning swinging around Queens, the afternoon taking a nap on the couch, the late afternoon swinging around queens, and the evening at decathlon practice at someones house. 

May spent her Thursdays worrying about Peter, but he knew she also spent them preparing lesson plans for her middle schoolers that year, and sending out emails or whatever it is adults had to do. May taught middle school at one of the lower-end private schools in Queens. She was a history teacher and a good mentor for the students. A good handful of her students ended up in high school with Peter which was always odd when they made the connection. 

This Thursday was slightly different. Decathlon practice was at MJ’s house that night and Peter was planning to forgo his normal mid-afternoon spiderman adventure in order to help her and her mom make dinner. This changed in an oddly drastic way when May called him halfway through his morning routine.

“May is calling.” Karen said. “I’m going to answer unless told otherwise.”

Peter found a rooftop to sit on so he could hear his aunt better. 

“Hello?” He said.

“Hey Peter, I can call MJ’s mom and let her know, but you’re doing dinner at home today.”

“What?” 

“I- well you can come home and look at it if you want, but I just got an email from an old friend of your parents who plans to visit tonight. He said he’s sorry for the short notice, but he- I don’t know, you can read it if you want it’s difficult to explain.”

Peter’s heart sunk. He hated politics. His parents had founded the biggest non-profit for African autonomy and assistance in recent history and they were both heavily involved in a lot of international politics because of it. They had a lot of old friends who sometimes intruded into Peter and May’s lives. 

“Can’t I be busy with school stuff?”

“No, they sounded like they’re bringing gifts and I don't feel comfortable accepting gifts for your parents without you here. I'm sorry Bug."

Ben used to do that part. Ben had done that part for years, taking the gifts that Peter didn’t have the strength to accept. Ben had always held Peter after the politicians left. This hadn’t happened in years, and Ben wasn’t able to help him anymore. In about a week, Ben would have been dead for a year. 

“I- Okay, uhm,” Peter tried to keep his voice even, “What time are they coming over?”

“Six.” May answered. “But I want to make them dinner so I’m gonna have you help because it’s last minute.”

Peter nodded from within his suit. It was last minute. That was normal for foreign politicians though.

“Yeah, okay I can call MJ, uhm, are you good if I stay out until lunch still?”

“Why don’t you come home a bit early since you’re gonna need time to cool down. You don’t need to come back right now, just soon alright?”

Peter sighed, “Yeah, uhm, yeah that sounds good.”

“Alright, you call MJ, I’m gonna run to the store and get stuff for dinner. Chicken Alfredo sound good?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Okay, I love you Peter, have Karen text me when you’re on your way home.”

“Will do, bye” Peter said. Karen hung up for him. “Karen call MJ for me.”

“Of course Peter.” She answered.

“Hey Peter, I’m working on homework, do you need something?”

“I can’t make it tonight.” Peter wanted to get this conversation over with quickly.

“What?” She was pissed, “Why not? I told you and Ned that I needed your hands for dinner, it better not be some internship thing because I-”

“People are coming over about my parents.” Peter said quickly. “Old friends or something like that. It happens sometimes, it happened more with weird old politicians right after they died, but apparently this one’s really important so I’ve gotta stay home.”

MJ was quiet for a few moments. “Sure, uhm just call if you need anything okay? If you need to talk or something before or afterwards. I’ll make sure Ned and I have our ringtones on.”

Peter smiled, “Will do MJ, thanks.”

“Anytime, have a good night.”

“Yep,” Peter said. He heard the line end and quickly swung back into the wind along the streets of Queens. “Karen is there anything for me to do? Preferably something that doesn’t have to do with my parents.”

“There are videos of a girl calling for her lost parrot three streets east of you." Karen said. 

"On it!" Peter swung on.

When he got back to his apartment he ate a quick lunch before passing out on the couch. May woke him up with enough time for them to quietly make dinner while tiptoeing around the fact that Ben wasn't there to answer the door for the foreign guests. By the time the door opened they had ignored the subject so well that Peter had no idea who was coming.

A knock came to the door.

“I got it-” May opened the door -“Good evening King T’Challa.”

Peter forced his jaw to not hit the floor.

“You as well Ms. Parker,” T’Challa kissed her hand, “Would you mind if Okoye took a quick look around the apartment before I come in, it’s a routine security policy.”

“Of course,” May stepped back and a tall, strong woman made her way around Peter’s apartment. She opened every door, and Peter was glad that May had made him clean his room even though they weren’t eating there. 

“We’re all clear your majesty.” She said coming back from a glance into the bathroom.

T’Challa smiled and allowed himself to be lead to the kitchen by May and Peter. Peter didn’t know what to do except get dinner ready and sit down in his chair. He had fought with T’Challa in Berlin. He had seen T’Challa get into fist fights while wearing a cat costume. He’d watched the same videos as the rest of the world when Wakanda came out of the shadows, and he knew his parents had worked with them. 

As they sat down at the table, T’Challa asked about Peter’s school and May’s work. Peter allowed himself to ask T’Challa one question about the use of Vibranium in fabrics and its strength when dispersed so thinly. T’Challa didn’t have an answer, however insisted that Peter and his sister would get along very well. Okoye, who hadn’t said very much, might have smiled at this idea.

After several minutes T’Challa took a pause in the conversation as an opening to begin the conversation he had come to start.

“Peter, as I told your aunt in the email I sent her this morning, my father knew your parents very well before their passing. We were all wounded greatly upon the news of their deaths.”

Peter swallowed and gave the king a nod.

“Your mother was the first American to devote her doctoral studies to our country, and your father worked alongside her in fights for our ability to maintain our secrecy. They both helped in working with my father on ensuring Wakanda maintained a peaceful image. In 2000, a few weeks after you were born, Mary was invited into Wakanda to better understand our situation and the reason for our secrecy. She was the first and last foreigner who my father entrusted with our secrets.”

“She kept our secrets until her capture and death at the hands of our enemies and for that our people are grateful.” T’Challa paused for a moment, “As May is aware, my father brought my sister and I to America for Mary and Richard’s funeral. He gave Ben the gifts that we were able to give at the time, and on Bens passing, my father ensured a trip to the United States allowed himself to attend his funeral and grieve over the recent news regarding Mary and Richard’s deaths.”

Peter looked at May for confirmation of this. He’d been too much of a mess that day to remember much, nevertheless a king who’d apparently known his family.

“I assumed that was him,” she gave a small smile, “Ben had talked about occasionally getting an email or two from a friend of Mary’s but I never knew the extent.”

T’Challa returned her smile, “It was always my father’s wish that Mary’s family be given a gift that truly showed the gratefulness of our Wakandan people. Unfortunately he was unable to see that day. As King now of a nation which has come out of its hiding, I would like to offer you what my father could not.”

T’Challa pulled out a small toy, and a woven quilt which Peter recognized from one that had hung in their living room before May put it in storage. He held the toy out to Peter. It was a small metal rhino with blue and gold patterns along its side.

“This is a common toy for our children in Wakanda. In her few days in our country your mother had expressed to mine several times that she wanted you to have one. It is a wind-up toy which uses vibranium cores allowing it a longer life and higher durability. She was unable to bring one to you as a child, however I would like for you to have one now.”

Peter felt tears start to stream down his cheeks. He took the small toy in his hands and imagined his mothers around them. He slowly wound up the rhino, turning the smooth disk on its side. He set it next to his chili bowl and watched as it took several steps forward, bowed, and then continues to walk, bowing every several steps. Okoye was kind enough to turn it back to him and allow it to make its way into his hands again where he held it until it stopped moving on its own.

Peter looked up to thank T'Challa and found the king to be crying as well. May sniffled and Peter looked over to see her crying at the toy in his hands.

"We also brought a traditional tapestry," T'Challa held forward the woven cloth which Peter took, handing the rhino to May for a moment. "The one given to you at their funeral was woven without the vibranium protection that we often embed in our tapestries. This one however has vibranium woven in allowing it to withstand much more, and be used as protection as necessary. It is a gift for families to be given in their times of grief in Wakanda."

This was too much for Peter. The cloth felt light, but strong in his hands. His sensitive skin could pick out the vibranium interwoven and interlocked within the tapestry and could feel that it could stop bullets if it needed to. It was meant to provide protection to a grieving family. It could have protected Ben. 

Of course there was no way Ben would have had this on the night he was shot, yet the knowledge that it could have saved his life took over. His grip tightened along the fibers of the fabric and he let out a sob. May put a hand on his shoulder and for the first time in a long time, he ached for his mothers hand instead. A hand that had wanted to give him the rhino, and watch him play with it. They could have watched it crawl along the table while his dad held them close. 

Peter swallowed down an oncoming sob in order to look back up at T’Challa. The man didn’t seem ashamed of his tears. He looked just as lost in the emotion as Peter felt, and Peter was suddenly reminded of the fact that T’Challa’s father wasn’t here to help present these gifts. T’Challa had gone against his father's wishes to bring these here, into America. Peter found himself gripping the tapestry even tighter, glad that he didn’t have to worry about ripping it.

“Thank you,” his voice shook. “Thank you so much for bringing these. It, it really means a lot.”

“It truly is our pleasure.” T’Challa answered, his voice no more stable than Peters.

May let out a shaky breath and squeezed Peter’s shoulder before letting it go. “They would be so proud of you Peter.” She whispered.

Peter looked up to her with a smile. He saw the way she cradled the small rhino, and wished she’d put her hand back on his shoulder and never let him go. It was going to be a pajama and movie night for sure.

“Unfortunately we must go now,” Okoye said softly, “We are taking residency with friends in upstate New York tonight and need to remain punctual for them.”

T’Challa nodded and stood up, dishes in hand. “Where would you like us to put our dishes?”

May shot out of her seat, cradling the rhino in her left arm while she took T’Challa’s dishes with her right, “That’s alright, we can take care of dishes. It’s my night to wash.” 

“Thank you very much.” T’Challa responded as May gathered the dishes around the table. She nearly dropped a plate due because she hadn’t stopped holding the Rhino, and T’Challa helped her get all the dishes over to the sink despite her protests that he had already been so kind.

They made their way out the door, and May insisted that they were walked down to the street where they said their goodbyes. 

By the time May and Peter got back to the apartment, most of their tears had dried. Peter texted MJ and Ned to let them know he would call them about it soon. May silently cleaned their dinner up and the pair got into their pajamas before they made their way to the couch. Peter draped the tapestry over them while May got the dvd player going.

“You probably can’t normally use this as a blanket Petey,” she whispered, “It’s supposed to hang on the wall.”

Peter curled into her. “I like that I can grip it without worrying about it ripping. I tore a hole in a few blankets after Ben died. I can’t tear the vibranium.”

May was quiet for a little bit. “I think they would like that you found comfort in it.”

Peter smiled as she hit play on the third Harry Potter movie. She shifted for a moment to pick up the toy rhino before going back to their comfortable position.

“You still going to Tony’s tomorrow? It’s Friday.” May said as Hedwig's theme played.

“Yeah,” Peter answered quietly, “I’ll tell him I just want to work or something, I could use the distraction.”

“Are you going to tell him you met the King of Wakanda again?” She asked.

“Isn’t it a secret? Also, the first time definitely doesn’t count.” Peter looked up at her.

She shrugged, “It was a secret until tonight. He sounded like after he got where he was going tonight he wasn’t really worried about a security threat or anything like that. So you could probably tell Tony.”

Peter gave a small nod, “We’ll see, I- I don’t know if I can talk about it yet, that was a lot.”

May nodded, “That’s fair, I might send him a text and let him know you’re coming in late then. I think it’s gonna be a rough night and I want you to sleep in if you can.”

Peter curled into her as the dialogues started on screen. "That's fair," he muttered. "You have a school meeting tomorrow right?"

"Yeah, 7:30, so just text Happy when you wake up okay?"

Peter showed up at the tower still in his pajamas, Wakandan tapestry thrown over his shoulders. As May had predicted the night had been rough. They had fallen asleep on the couch and May woke Peter up when he started shaking. He couldn’t remember the dream but he couldn’t fall asleep after it either. He fell back asleep in his bed around three and woke up two hours later in a cold sweat, screaming for someone to help him get out of the rubble. He was awake when May got ready to go to work, and texted Happy a few minutes after she left.

“Pajamas kid?” Tony asked when Peter got to the workshop. “And a blanket? You know we’ve got blankets here right?”

“It was a rough night,” Peter answered.

Tony gave Peter a bit of a sorry look, “I wish I didn’t have to do this kid, May told me you guys talked about some heavy stuff last night, but we’ve got fancy guests coming to the lab today so I’m gonna need you in a t-shirt and jeans minimum. I’ve gotta pretend we have standards.”

Peter gave him a weird look. “Am I really that sleep deprived or did you just suggest that other people were gonna be in the lab today? As in not us, Pepper, Happy and maybe another Avenger who needs you for a meeting?”

Tony nodded tight lipped.

“Okay, why?” Peter tried again.

“Because I think one of them might bsmerthne” He mumbled towards the end.

Peter started smirking, “What was that?”

“Because one of them might e smtr th me”

“One of them what?”

“One of them might be smarter than me but it’s not that big of a deal, it’s not like she already told me how she’d like to improve on my flight technology or anything. I’ll survive the day, my ego just might not. Honestly I’ll probably be too blown away by the corrections to realize I’m being belittled until it’s over. Hopefully I don’t come off as an ass. We’ll see what happens.”

Peter started at Tony. “Who’s coming over?”

Tony was moving around the room, nervous energy obvious in his fidgeting with every tool he saw. “I’m not gonna tell you, it’ll brighten both of our moods for this to be a surprise to you. Also, I’m slightly worried that you’re going to love one of them, uhm, the certifiably genius one.”

“You’re really scared of him aren’t you?”

“I am not scared, and it’s a ‘her’ so check yourself there kid.” Tony smiled goodheartedly at Peter.

Peter nodded and went over to his workstation. “When do I have to be in a t-shirt by?” 

Tony looked at his clock. “They should be up and on their way down four hours and they’re coming straight down here. So maybe change in three hours? Sound fair?”

Peter thought for a second, “Can I keep the tapestry?”

Tony smiled a bit, “Sure but why don’t you throw it onto the couch when they come in okay? And if you’re going to have it thrown over you like that we can call it a blanket for today.”

Peter nodded and got into his work. He was helping Tony configure miniature arc reactors into prosthetic limbs so that they wouldn’t have to be taken off for charging. Peter’s design of the miniature arc reactor still had overheating issues, and he was in charge of engineering a proper agent that would protect the wires without ruining the arc reactors. Peter spent most of the morning running through chemical equations and throwing ideas around with Tony as he fiddled with the mechanics of an iron legion gauntlet. The insulant proved to be a good distraction. And allowed him and Tony to get into a good groove.

“Boss, Pepper would like to ask that you come upstairs to greet your guests before bringing them down to the lab.” Friday said.

“Shit,” Tony put his tools down and looked around. “Blanket on the work couch, run up to your room and get changed. Time slipped away, I need you in a better t-shirt and nicer pants when they come down. Sound good?”

Peter nodded, getting up taking the tapestry with him to his room. He would bring it back with him, but being without it felt wrong right now. He’d almost brought the rhino as well, but ended up leaving that on his desk at home. In the time it took him to get change, space off for a few moments, and make his way back downstairs, Tony had already seemed to start the tour of his lab.

Peter thought about going back upstairs, leaving the grown ups alone and opening a new notebook. Starting on a fresh page without everything around him may give him a new look at the coolant, or at the very least some space to allow his mind to process the current emotional roller coaster he was on. 

“That you Peter? Come on in here I’ve got someone I want you to meet.” 

Peter could hear the grin on Tony’s face. He turned the corner and felt the tapestry slide off his shoulders and onto the floor as he took in the sight before him. King T’Challa was standing next to Tony as a younger girl looked over some of the notes Peter had been working on.

“Hi, uhm,” Peter started.

“This is Peter Parker,” Tony introduced. “Peter this is King T’Challa of Wakanda, and Princess Shuri.”

“Peter and I have met,” T’Challa smiled softly.

Tony paled and looked at Peter worried. “Uhm he was over for dinner last night, uhm, yeah.” 

Now Tony looked confused, but Shuri looked sorry. “You are Mary’s son?” She asked.

Peter nodded, realized he’d dropped the tapestry that probably wasn’t supposed to be used as a blanket, and glanced at it. 

“Is that the new tapestry?” She asked walking towards Peter.

“Musa ukumothusa Shuri.” T’Challa said.

“Udiniwe wayeka ukuyibamba. Besides I want him to show me what he’s doing with the cooling stuff. It’s confusing.”

Peter stared at her as she picked up the blanket and placed it around him. She spoke quietly to him. “It’s normal to wear it like this and hold it, don’t let Pepper hang it up on a wall. You American’s do silly things like that sometimes. I packed the one Nakia made me after my father died. It’s okay to want them close.” 

Peter was overrun by emotions. 

Shuri didn’t seem to notice as she grabbed his hand and dragged him to his workspace. “Now show me what you were doing with the carbon chains here because that’s oddly biological for a coolant isn’t it?”

Peter looked at the part of the notebook that she was talking about. 

“Uhm,” He reread the notes from half an hour ago, happy to be talking about work. “Yeah it is, but I’ve seen carbon chains used for strength and durability before. The only problem I’ve had with them is that when they remain in a dissolvable, non-living form for too long they tend to dissolve. I was fiddling with the properties up here, seeing if I could find a solution to that, but nothing had worked yet. I was going to come back to it later.”

“Where have you seen it work before? I’ve never seen carbon chains used like this.” Shuri asked as her finger trailed further down the paper.

“I work with spiderman’s webbing sometimes,” Peter tried to be casual about the way he said it. As though it was part of his job and not something he’d created.

Shuri however had no problem showing that this was not something casual. “Wait you’ve met him!” She turned to T’Challa who looked exhausted by her antics, “Have you met Spiderman for real? Like the real life spiderman? And you’ve worked with his webbing before? Is he like twitter user real-spidey-five-seven-zero-three-six-zero-capital-b-”

“Do you have it memorized?!” Peter asked.

“Do you not?”

“I mean I do but, I- I don’t know anyone else who does.” This was a lie. Ned did. (So did Flash.)

“Does that mean that Spiderman actually does control that account holy shit do you know what the numbers mean, please, please tell me you know what the numbers mean!”

“I-” Peter stumbled. He ran the account. He was @RealSpidey570360BC02C1a5664D7. He knew what the numbers meant. He did not want to talk about the numbers today. “I don’t really talk to spider man much, more of a sciencey guy. Uhm, I don’t know if it’s his account but I do follow it extensively.”

“Which account is this?” Tony asked.

Peter forced himself not to flinch at Tony’s interest. To his delight, Shuri seemed intent on ignoring anyone over twenty in the room. “You follow him too! Oh my gosh! Holy crap! I think he’s so cool. And if he isn’t spider man then he definitely knows spiderman. Also the side account @guyinthechair. Much easier to hack by the way. His firewalls were crazy but I got a location. He exists, and is in queens. But that’s not as public of knowledge. He’s super cool too but because of the hackability I’m pretty sure they’re not the same guy.”

“You got his location?” Peter tried to sound amazed but really he was just worried for Ned.

“I did. I got New York area and assumed Queens, which is dumb and probably wrong, but I’ve kind of romanticized Queens a bit in my head. When I heard my brother was going there yesterday I almost made him take me so I could go looking for spiderman.”

“We were trying to be quiet about our presence Shuri. We visited families who knew Baba. Spiderman is always drawing attention to himself, you would not-”

“I know why I couldn’t talk to spiderman, it’s fine. Spiderman wasn’t out yesterday anyways.”

“And how do you know that?” Tony asked. He seemed to have about a thousand questions and had started getting worse at hiding it when Shuri mentioned Ned’s twitter account.

“Well for starters, there’s about a thousand twitter and reddit accounts dedicated entirely to Spiderman sightings. Second, @spideyforreal would have tweeted something, because he seems to either be spiderman, or follow enough blogs to know to tweet when Spidermans had a night out. Third, I’m obsessed with spiderman and he doesn’t normally go out on Friday nights so no one really expected him to do too much if anything. We don’t know why. Just like we don’t know what the numbers mean!”

“Any other weekly patterns I should know about? I’ll tell Spidey to vary it up a bit more.” Tony kept a surprisingly even voice. Peter only knew he was stressed because he’d seen a truly relaxed Tony before.

“Tons, I can send you some graphs on it if you’d like. They’ll all have x- axis too if you know what those are.”

“What?” Peter asked turning to Tony.

“Shit, I-”

“He showed me a flight length to firing numbers graph without an x axis.” Shuri beat Tony to it.

“I'm still gonna blame Friday for trying to sabotage me. Actually no, I think it's a blame Peter kind of day. You did this on purpose, didn't you?" 

"Yep, thought I'd make you look dumb," Peter joked, both he and Tony knew that Peter had no access to those files.

"It's not like it's hard." Shuri smiled, "but that's not the point, what else do you know about Spider man? You said you worked with his webbing? Does it come out of him or do you manufacture it, and if it comes out of him then are you able to replicate it later, or do you have to take samples?"

"Christ there's two of you," Tony muttered.

"It doesn't come out of him," Peter answered, "He created the webbing and the shooters on his own before he met Mr. Stark, and then with a bit of my help has been perfecting more ways to use them."

"Do you help him stick to walls too?"

"No, that he does on his own."

"That one you can feel if he's stressed too," Tony added, "He has trouble turning it off sometimes and accidentally sticks himself to surfaces and handshakes. It's amusing."

"He can stick to human skin? Well I guess after glass it's not that bad. Vibranium can be polished to be smoother than glass sometimes though, can he stick to Mr. America's shield?"

"Captain, Shuri, Captain America." T'Challa corrected.

Shuri rolled her eyes, "Can he stick to Captain America’s shield?"

Peter had no idea. He turned to Tony, "We never tested that."

Tony thought for a second, "He held it for a bit in Berlin when everything went South but I never asked if he stuck to it I guess."

"Other things were on our mind in Berlin." T'Challa agreed. "Speaking of, we should be going upstairs for our meeting in a moment. I would like to formally introduce myself to everyone before the meeting begins and your Secretary joins us. I would also like to explain the situation regarding my sisters patient in more detail with Captain Rogers if possible.”

Tony gave a tight nod, “That sounds like a plan.” He looked at Peter and Shuri. “You okay if these two stay in the lab?”

“It is your lab, but I trust my sister on her own in our labs every day. I do not think she would do anything to put bring you or Peter harm.” T’Challa’s voice had an edge of warning towards his sister.

“I might ask Peter a thousand questions about Spiderman, but I will not blow him up.”

“That’s okay,” Tony began to walk out of the room with T’Challa. “The kid can match your questions. Peter she’s got nano-tech.” With that he sauntered towards the elevator with T’Challa close behind. “Oh and Peter text me the number behind that spidey twitter account. If it’s his I bet I can crack it. The guy likes changing the base around on me in our file names, and I know which numbers he prefers.”

Peter swallowed thickly and tried not to look nervous at the idea of Tony getting his twitter code. Right now only Ned knew what it meant, and even that took a while.

“Do you think it really means anything?” Shuri asked.

“So you’re just gonna pretend he didn’t just say that you invented nanotech?” 

“I’ll show it to you while we start running through different bases for this spiderman code. Come on, it’s a fun puzzle and I never cared to try much other than scrambling around the Hex code. If it’s in base 14, or 15, or if the letters are just distractions, then we’ve got a whole new problem coming on.”

“I’m not great at doing base calculations in my head,” a lie, “And there is no way I’m running out base calculations instead of learning about nanotech while you’re here. Also, I can probably show you some of spiderman’s webbing if you want to see it. I can’t tell you how it’s made because Tony’s still working on how we’re supposed to go about patenting and creative licensing with a secret identity in the mix, but you can mess with it if you want.”

This satisfied Shuri for the time being. They spent a lot of time playing with the nanotechnology of what Peter could tell was supposed to be part of Black Panther’s suit. Peter took notes of all the properties she talked about, and how they are linked together. Threw a few ideas at her about how to make it softer using a more velcro like grip, and using some basic biology and cell movement tactics to allow for movement between nanites. 

She discussed how the vibranium had yet to work well with biological particles on a nano-level which surprised him into asking for a vibranium sample.

“Don’t tell Tony,” She whispered as she handed him several vials with vibranium rods. “He’ll get jealous, as I only gave him one.”

Peter smirked. “Friday can you keep that between us?”

“I won’t tell Boss unless he directly asks how much you were given Peter.”

“Thanks Friday!” 

“Alright now show me the coolant!” Shuri moved back to Peter’s notebook where the made some progress over the next several minutes. They worked through the ideas that Peter had been working through. Some Shuri shot down after a few moments of looking, but most of them Peter had to walk her through large parts before she caught onto where he was stuck. Both of them greatly enjoyed the company of someone who could speak in science and knew what a meme was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The week leading up to the anniversary is told in chronological order with in Universe one shots of Peter, Ben, and May's lives placed in coordinated spots between the chapters. All chapters that belong to this fic are published in the fic, the one shots will be published here as well. All chapters are mostly finished, but because of the way it's drafted I'm open to new ideas for one shots that you would like to see!
> 
> Please leave a comment and let me know what you liked, and what you'd like to see! Also PLEASE let me know in future chapters if you ever get confused about when the scene takes place. I think it should be good, but I wrote the story so I'm really familiar with it.
> 
> THANKS FOR READING!!!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> May and Ben find themselves in sole custody of their four year old nephew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: Grief/Mourning
> 
> This is the first 1-shot, the work will mostly alternate back and forth between the one shots and the main story which began in chapter 1. If you're ever confused about the timeline please let me know! I'm so familiar with it by now that I might not notice if I forget to mention something.
> 
> I also changed the total chapter number due to a change in pacing towards the end. The entire fic has been written and is being checked for continuity errors right now!

FOURISH YEARS AFTER PETER’S BORN

It was the perfect definition of a lazy Saturday. May and Ben had been constantly improving their lazy Saturdays since they got married. They started the morning with the news on the living room tv. They watched as much as they could handle before they turned it off and started cleaning. They did bathrooms, and the living room on Saturday mornings, with the kitchen in the afternoon. The faster they finished cleaning, the more time May had to teach Ben how to cook a meal in Italian. He’d been learning the language since they met and was getting very good at reading May’s mother’s recipes. After a late lunch they sit around on the couch. May teaches Ben more Italian, or Ben reads to May, or they take a trip to the library to find a VHS tapes to play before Mary and Richard join them for an evening of movies and popcorn.

This Saturday was not quite as lazy. Mary and Richard were leaving early in the morning for a work trip so Peter slept in the guest room. The news never got turned on because Peter had a minor meltdown about breakfast cereals. Ben was really good with Peter though. May had to leave the room because she couldn’t stop smiling at how patient Ben was with Peter. He talked Peter down from his need for Frosted Flakes and got him to eat an entire bowl of Lucky Charms. By the end of the morning Ben had convinced Peter that the spray to clean the bathroom was fun to wipe off and they had cleaned the tub and toilet together.

Peter watched cartoons while Ben and May made lunch. She read the instructions to him in Italian but they kept up a conversation in english.

“Hey Ben,” May said after he put in a few more spices.

“Yeah?” Ben turned to her as he began stirring the sauce.

“I know we talked about it a few months ago, and we were still kind of waiting for your promotion, but what do you think about me stopping my birth control?”

This got his attention. He glanced to Peter and then back at May. “You like having Peter over? Because watching a kid for five days while his parents make political deals is different than raising one.”

“I know that Ben.” May sighed, “I do know that, I just, I really think you’d be a great father. You’re so patient with him, I think you have more self control than Richard does which-”

“That’s not fair May, he was sick.”

“I’m not talking about his drinking Ben, I’m talking about the fact that Richard might have needed to have Mary help him get Peter to eat Lucky Charms. You’re really good with him.”

“I’m also not his dad so he listens to me better May, he-”

“Ben this really isn't the point of this. I’m not mad at Richard. I still think you’d be a good dad. I’m not saying I’m stopping now. I’m saying we’ve been waiting and seeing you and Peter together kind of makes me want to consider when we’re gonna stop waiting.”

Ben sighed. “I- Okay, yeah,” He started smiling, “Yeah, I really think that would- we could start thinking about that. You know you’d be a pretty good mom yourself.” He was really smiling now. “You’re really good with him too. Would you want to come home from school just to deal with your own kid?”

“I love it with Peter.” May said. “I really do, because I get to know Peter so much better, and he trusts me more than my kids at school. I- I don’t think that would bug me. Are you saying we can like, really talk about this later. Maybe after someone has fallen asleep?”

Ben was smiling like an idiot now. "Yeah, yeah we should talk about this later. Now you've got me all excited May, how am I supposed to get Peter's favorite pasta right?"

May smiled. "I think you'll manage."

"Peter," Ben called into the living room, "May's making me screw up your pasta!"

"What?!" Peter turned to May. He ran in from the living room. "May watch Clifford with me! Don't mess up pasta!"

"If I watch Clifford with you how will I be able to help Ben with lunch? He can't read Italian." She pointed to the recipe.

Peter grabbed the recipe off the counter and held it in his small hands. "What's Italian?"

"It means it's not English. You know how Ben and I sometimes talk to each other in words you, Mommy, and Daddy don't know?"

"Oh yeah! Mommy said you were speaking another tongue like Babbel!"

May looked to Ben hoping this was one of the Jewish stories Richard had taught Peter.

"That's right," Ben answered with a smile. "You want to learn a word or two in Italian Peter?"

"How do you say Pasta?!"

"Same way we do in English." May smiled. "Pasta is the same in both languages."

"Woah!" Peter stared at the pots Ben was making pasta in. "Pasta! Pasta! Pasta! Pasta!" Peter danced around the room, "May I'm speaking in two different languages listen! Pasta! Pasta! Pasta!" He giggled so hard he sat down on the floor.

May laughed with him and Ben smiled at them as he stirred the noodles again. 

"Out of the way Petey." Ben took the pot off the stove and the phone started ringing. "I've gotta take the noodles to the sink, May can you get the phone?"

May gave another laugh at Peter as he slid out of Ben's way. May went to the landline, making faces at Peter as he kept saying 'pasta.'

"This is May Parker," She answered the phone.

"Hello you and your husband Ben Parker are the emergency contacts for Mary and Richard Parker correct?"

May's heart dropped. 

The next twenty minutes began with a dropped strainer full of pasta and ended with the news finally playing in the living room over the sounds of a four year old screaming.

A social worker arrived half an hour later. She was tired and worn out. She walked May through the paperwork to say that her and Ben were now legally responsible for Peter Parker. They also took ownership of all of the couple's property, possessions, and wealth, as laid out in their wills.

Ben held Peter. A police officer showed up due to a neighbor who was worried Peter was being hurt. May felt bad for the officer who had to ask that they quiet down the shocked four year old.

She couldn't look either of the boys in the eye. Peter hadn't opened his eyes in minutes and Ben had yet to look at her, choosing mostly to watch the news coverage of the plane crash. Mary and Richard were the closest things to celebrities on the plane. Their professional photos were shown as the wreckage played in the background. The news was telling their audience what May and Richard had accomplished in their ‘short lives.’ May felt her stomach turn.

May started working on taking full custody of Peter immediately, as suggested by the social worker. The woman pushed her through the paperwork and made sure Ben and May had every possible reason to be able to keep Peter in their home. She didn't seem worried Peter would be taken from them. 

May mindlessly filled in financial paperwork saying that her and Ben's income could support a four year old. It could. It just meant they weren't doing a big summer trip for a few years.

By the time the social worker left Peter wasn't screaming. He was almost asleep in Ben's shaking arms. It should have been peaceful.

Wednesday was the wake. There weren't bodies. It was long and painful. So many political figures and campaign staffers made their appearance. General Thaddeus Ross thought it appropriate to hug Peter. Peter hadn't hugged May in two days because it reminded him of his mom so much he couldn't stop crying. The General didn't ask.

Kings and Presidents from African countries visited with gifts. Ben talked for a half-hour with a King named T’Chaka and his children. They gave a beautiful tapestry. Mary had been granted their highest honors, and his daughter Shuri had loved her. Shuri, for her part, was very well behaved for a four year old at a political wake. Peter was not, and every politician who scowled at the grieving boy’s cries lost May’s support immediately. 

May’s knees gave out when her co-workers walked in the door, and Ben helped her sit down while her fellow teachers paid their respects. The math teacher who May would call her best friend had been unable to make it, however May knew she would be over that night as she had promised to make dinner. The teachers left soon after they came, having all used their lunch break to visit May. 

May sat next to Peter while more politicians wished her their respects. Some had enough dignity to look upset. Others had the nerve to discuss how unfortunate it was that Richard’s last four years had been spent more-and-more as a father rather than on politics. May squeezed Peter’s hand glad he was too young to understand what they were saying. 

They took a taxi back to their apartment after the burial. Peter had fallen asleep soon after they left the burial. Ben didn’t talk the whole ride back.

“I’m glad they worked for that non-profit because their co-workers are such kind people, and those politicians were fucking despicable.” Ben said as he walked into the kitchen. He had just laid Peter on their guest bed. They hadn’t gotten the chance to move furniture from Mary and Richard’s apartment yet.

May let out a short laugh. “Glad it’s not just me.”

“Did you see the way they looked at Peter?” He asked. “Our state senator looked at Peter like she couldn’t understand why he was crying so loud. Honestly what the fuck.”

May slowly pulled Ben into a hug. “I don’t get it either babe.” 

“I- God that fucking pissed me off. And that fucking General hugged him!”

“Ben you’ve gotta keep your voice down.” May whispered, “He’s exhausted.”

Ben’s whole body deflated in May’s arms. “I know, I- I know. Fuck May we’re his parens now aren’t we?” Ben whispered. “No more babysitting or shit? It’s us and him.”

May nodded. It terrified her.

“I don’t know anything about parenting a four year old May.” Ben whispered.

“Ben that is so far from true.”

“Really-”

“Ben you know so much more than you give yourself credit for. Even just the past couple of days during this whole and utter shitstorm you have done as good of a job as anyone. You know how to cook. You love reading to people. You know how to tell him no. I- I don’t know I told you Saturday, you’ll be a great dad.”

Ben was crying again. “God to think Saturday morning we were thinking about doing this on our own. The universe is fucked up like that huh?”

May nodded. “I thought about that when the social worker asked about future kids.”

“She did?”

“Yeah, I told her we didn’t plan on any within the next year or two. I think you were still watching the news.”

Ben nodded. “I was terrified they were going to find a way to vilify them through this. Richard always-” Ben took a deep breath. “Richard always said their relationship with the media was on edge. The minute the media found something to strike with they probably would because all of Mary’s work was so anti-capitalist.”

May nodded, she’d heard Mary worry about this. Mary had been worried that Peter would get swept up in his parents media storm. May was crying too.

“I was so worried Peter would have to watch the media slander his parents during this.”

“They didn’t do anything wrong,” May said, “And I’d honestly be a bit more worried about your having to watch your brother go through that than Peter who doesn’t understand it Ben.”

Ben sighed. “I hate this."

May reached up to run a finger through his hair." I know Benny I know."

“And then they started talking about the fucking plane crash like it was another mystery. I wish I didn’t care how weird the photos were or how it happened at an oddly convenient time for whatever terrorist group is most active in the area or whatever. I just can’t stop thinking about it. What if they’re alive? And I know it’s insane, and I know that it’s now way to live, but I can’t fucking help it and it’s gonna drive me nuts if I’m not careful.”

May laid a hand on Bens back trying to calm him down. “The news just wants something to talk about, it’ll blow over.”

Ben nodded quietly. The two held each other in the kitchen for a moment.

“How much stuff is still at their apartment? Is it going to take a while to go through?” Ben asked.

May sighed, she’d been in charge of this so far. Ben had been taking care of Peter, setting up the funeral, and contacting the politicians who he knew Richard talked highly of. She had been dealing with Mary and Richard’s belongings, and making sure that Peter could live with them as soon as possible. 

“Peter and I cleaned out his room on Tuesday. That was during those two or three good hours that he had in the afternoon. Where he was quiet for a while. So we have all of his little things, and I’m sure you saw that I put his sheets on the small guest bed in the office.” Ben was nodding along. “I dealt with their food and stuff, kept what I could, threw some away. I still couldn't go into their bedroom, and I don't know what you want to do with their clothes."

"Richards clothes is all to small for me," Ben whispered. "We could probably keep his sweatshirts and stuff so Peter can have them later, but I don't even know if he had many of those."

"I thought about just keeping all their comfy clothes, anything that Peter might want, and donating all their professional stuff to a clothing closet of sorts. I know Mary used one of them when she was first getting interviews and talked about how it saved her life."

Ben nodded, "I like that idea. They've both got so much of it too."

May nodded and the pair moved to the couch.

"Kate's coming over for dinner right?" Ben asked.

"Yeah, she's the only other person I trust with pasta so I told her she was fine, we could probably use a break from this anyways."

Ben nodded. "You think Peter will eat much?"

"I don't know," May shrugged. "He's gotta be getting hungry, but I also know Ms. Harris got him to eat a bunch of apple and cheese slices and with her. Jean said she used to be an elementary school teacher so she's got some tricks into getting kids to eat."

"Do you have her contact info? Could you ask her for tips?"

May shook her head, "No but Jean probably does."

Ben sighed. "Is he, I know this is a stupid question, but is he gonna be okay after all this?"

May nodded. "I think so. He’s got us.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continues off of Chapter 1:  
> Shuri and Peter just experimented in Tony's labs for a while and are going to dinner with Steve, Tony, and T'Challa

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I normally will update on Thursdays as I did for the first two chapters, the break was because of the holidays, life got crazy but starting this Thursday it'll be regular again!  
> Let me know what you think in the comments below!
> 
> Trigger Warnings at the end

ONE WEEK BEFORE THE ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF BEN'S DEATH

“Odd question for you,” Peter said as he and Shuri walked towards the kitchen for lunch. They’d spent hours going back and forth about nanotechnology and carbon-based coolants in the lab.

“Yeah?”

“Tony said he thought you would be leagues beyond him, but we seemed to keep a pretty good pace with each other. Does your reputation precede you or was Tony worried about something else? Because I’ve never seen him give up his ego as fast as he did when he heard you were coming.”

Shuri seemed about as comfortable with this questioning as Peter had been when she’d asked to meet Spider-man. “A lot of my work is easier due to the properties of Vibranium. This helps especially in mechanical and electrical engineering. I’ve been able to apply these projects to biomedical things, by using imaging software that’s enhanced by vibranium, and tools that are more precise than you could manufacture easily, but I haven’t yet been able to use vibranium to push biochemistry into new bounds. Uhm, I like staying where I’m comfortable. So I just push the bounds of mechanics instead of making my own webbing or a carbon-based electrical insulation.”

“Oh, so you’re one of those ‘physics is the best things in the world people aren’t you?” Peter asked, filled with fake disgust.

Shuri let out a laugh, “Physics is safer with me, I like to test things too much to feel calm with medicine.”

Peter smiled at that, “That’s fair.”

“Your a bio boy though aren’t you? Bio and chemistry until death do you part?”

Peter smirked, “You could say that yeah. It’s more fun when there's so much yet to be done. I also don't like the idea of getting really good at flight mechanics. My parents were in a plane crash and I feel like if I understood planes I’d want to know more details on how the terrorists crashed it, and that just leads to a whole mess of emotional turmoil that I don’t want to spiral into.”

Shuri nodded and gave him a small smile. Peter saw her glance at the tapestry he’d thrown back over his shoulders for the walk to lunch. 

“I am very sorry about your parents by the way. I don’t remember it, but T’Challa says we met your mother when we were younger. He and my mother seemed to be fond of the memory.”

Peter didn’t know how to respond to this. He’d heard it before, from May, and Ben, and thousands of diplomats, but to hear it from someone he barely knew with such emotion was something different entirely. 

“Thanks,” He said after a bit, “I, um, I’m sorry to hear about your father. I can’t imagine dealing with that in the middle of all the political stuff I’m sure you had to deal with. I- when my uncle died my grades dropped for the first time in my life. That was fixable, I can’t even guess what that must have been like for you.”

Shuri smiled and put a hand on his arm. “Thank you,” her voice was shaking a bit but she held it sturdy. “Now let’s walk faster because Tony said it was hotdogs for lunch and I haven’t had a hotdog in years.”

Peter laughed at this and followed her up the stairs.

The lunch started off awkward at best. Captain America sat by Tony and King T'Challa where they continued to talk about more details of the regulations various governments were trying to put on them. Apparently Sweden was being particularly difficult to work with. 

Peter and Shuri tried to continue talking about the coolant Peter was working on, but there were no notebooks allowed at the lunch table per Peppers rule, and they'd gotten to a point where they needed to write things down. T'Challa quickly caught on when they started playing with the nanoparticles under the table and told Shuri to keep them away from the food.

Eventually, after many discussions of Sweden's attempt at an avengers level policy, Spiderman was brought up. Captain America did it without even knowing what he'd done.

"Ross still wants to know about the kid Tony. I know he didn't bring it up with T'Challa here because there was other stuff, but you've gotta tell Spider-Man what's going on." 

Peter forced himself to keep eating his food like a normal person.

"What does Secretary Ross want with Spider-Man?" T'Challa asked.

"Not with kids at the table," Tony answered smoothly between bites.

"What?" Shuri asked loudly. "We had to listen to fifteen minutes of arguing about Swedish border law but you can't tell us the one interesting thing you've talked about all day?!"

Captain America chuckled. "It's not like it's gruesome Tony."

"I know, but I know Peter, and Peter will tell Spiderman on accident. Not a problem I want."

"He should know, it's not like they're asking him to sign the Sokovia Accords, just-"

"I said not at the table Steve. Spiderman was offered a spot, he declined, he's just a friendly neighborhood Spiderman now and we have no right to pull him into this."

"Is the offer not still standing then? Because I remember you saying you hadn't ex-"

"Steve you do not understand how frequently Peter has told Spiderman things he's not supposed to. Kid spoils everything. So let's shelve this conversation for a bit alright."

"Where does Peter see Spiderman? He's rarely here," now Captain America turned to Peter, "Do you go to school with him?"

Peter looked at Tony for help, but Shuri talked faster, "Wait how old is Spiderman? Is he our age?"

"Of course not Shuri," T'Challa started before turning to Tony, "He's at least eighteen correct?"

Captain America looked at Tony. Tony looked at Peter. Peter shrugged. 

“You’re the one who tells me to keep my mouth shut,” Peter said.

“Tony let it slip that he was in high school while we were in Berlin. I don’t know if he’s eighteen or not.” Captain America said.

“He’s not yet.” Tony clarified.

“Holy shit really?” Shuri asked.

“Language Shuri,” T’Challa said.

“You’re the one who taught me all the swear words brother!”

“Under the promise that you wouldn’t tell anyone about that.” He shot back.

Peter snorted which earned him a hard look from Tony. 

“What did I do?” He asked, knowing that Tony couldn’t answer that in front of them.

“Tony how old was Spiderman when he was asked to fight with us in Berlin?” T’Challa asked. “He was older than Shuri and Peter at least, yes?”

Tony desperately looked up at the sky. “How old is Shuri?”

“Seventeen now, but barely.” He answered.

Tony shook his head, “No he was, shit, um I think he was fourteen when I took him to Berlin.”

“Fifteen.” Peter corrected quickly.

“Fifteen?!” Steve nearly yelled. “Tony, you put us up against a fifteen-year-old?”

“He held his own, didn’t he? None of us were aiming to kill Steve.”

“I was.” T’Challa breathed out. “And I would not have hesitated if he had naively gone between Sergeant Barnes and me.”

Peter stared at T’Challa, reminded suddenly of the vibranium claws wore and the metal that sat in his pockets, and was woven along the tapestry on his shoulders.

The silence sat for a while. 

“So he’s only, what, sixteen now?” Steve asked quietly. “He’s sixteen and you’re still letting him fight? You invited him to the team?”

Tony nodded, “He’s a stubborn kid. I tried to take the suit away and he nearly killed himself taking down my plane. He’s not gonna stop fighting Steve, from what I’ve heard you understand that.”

“I was eighteen when I started pulling shit like this Tony! He’s a kid! He has parents who need to know! He has a family who should be sticking out for him! If my ma had been alive lord knows I wouldn’t have been allowed to enlist more than once and I was twenty-one years old!”

Peter’s face blanked. Captain America thought he shouldn’t be a superhero.

“His parents know.” Tony lied. “Can we not do this in front of them. Please. Spiderman will hear about it”

"Tony this conversation cannot wait." T'Challa insisted.

"Peter," Captain America turned to him with his signature PSA look about him. "Can you swear that none of this conversation makes it to Spiderman."

Peter stared back. Could he swear not to tell Spiderman? No. Could he swear not to tell Spiderman the important parts? No. Could he resist the Captain America PSA look? Not in eighth grade he couldn’t. He’d been to detention now though. And had taken hundreds of fitness exams. Captain America’s voice taking over the pacer is really what made him immune. He could resist the look. That was the only thing he had on his side.

"That look doesn’t work on me anymore.” Peter blurted, very aware that this was not the question.

“What?” Captain America, Tony, and T’Challa asked.

“That look, the one you just used. It, it doesn’t really work on me anymore. I get it in too many of the school videos.” Peter turned to Shuri. “Remind me to show you those later.”

Tony was obviously getting over the near-disaster situation by trying not to laugh. This confused Captain America even more, but T’Challa merely looked pensive.

“Tony,” T’Challa began. The calmness of his voice sobered Tony up fairly quickly. “Is there any way to force Spiderman to stop helping people?”

“It only makes the job more dangerous for him. He won’t stop and he’s stronger when he has our support.”

Tony went on to explain the situation with the Vulture. He left out the part where Peter survived a building falling on top of him. A building that had collapsed on him and left him alone. Tony was leaving out the most important part but Peter couldn’t call him out on it.

Shuri was asking questions about the plane’s systems and Captain America was trying to figure out how Peter and Tony had met. Tony was only answering Shuri’s questions. 

“Do his parents know? They’re okay with this? Tell me his parents know.” Captain America all but yelled. It sounded louder than it probably was.

Peter physically winced. He didn’t know, did he? He didn’t know what they would think of him being Spiderman. T’Challa’s father might have known. Maybe they’d told his mom about Black Panther and she’d said what she thought of him.

“I told you already his parents know.” Tony lied again.

“Did they know when he went to Berlin?” Steve's voice didn’t waver.

“I wasn’t,” Tony sighed. “I wasn’t entirely transparent with them. They still didn’t know his identity at the time. They didn’t find out until after the Avengers offer.”

Peter still hadn’t told his parents. May and he had driven him to see them earlier this year so that he could tell them but he never got the words out. Sure they probably knew, and he had the mask in his hands as he knelt in the slightly soggy grass. But he never said the words. Captain America was the pinnacle of excellence and he didn’t think Peter’s parents would have liked him. He didn’t think Peter should keep this a secret from his parents. 

Captain America's heart rate was going faster. Peter knew it was louder than everyone else's but this was a lot. Peter tried to push it aside and the rest of the world took over instead. 

“After the offer Tony? He’s a kid, his parents should know!”

T'Challa's heartbeat was loud too and beating faster. Tony's heart never beat normally but even he was loud in the kitchen. Pepper was two floors down talking to Happy about something. The lights in the kitchen were bright and humming. Peter blinked his eyes closed but that didn't get rid of the humming or the feel of his socks scratching against the sole of his foot. 

Someone yelled something else and Peter tensed at the way the sound pounded against his head. He'd worn fluffy socks today and now he could feel every strand as they crawled their way up to his ankle.

“Peter?” Tony was talking to him. He was yelling? Peter opened his eyes and the kitchen light reflected off the table forcing him to close them again. 

"Peter I need to know if you can hear me." Tony was closer. How had Peter missed him moving? Peter could hear everything, how did he miss Tony moving. People in the offices nearby were moving and he could hear them. Two of them must be going at it in a closet. There were moans. His socks were still scratching his feet. The blanket was heavy on his shoulders pushing the seam of his shirt into his shoulders. The blanket was supposed to protect him. Him and Ben. Ben had been dead for nearly a year. Peter couldn't hear Ben's voice anymore.

"Breathe Peter," Tony's voice again. It sounded like a whisper but it took over his senses because it was so close.

Was he not breathing? He felt himself gasp air into his lungs and realized he couldn't breathe. He was having a panic attack. Shit. He was having a panic attack in front of everyone. How had it snuck up on him like this? He’s supposed to be able to get out of the room. He couldn’t have a panic attack in front of everyone. The people in the closet were breathing faster.

Hands caught him before he realized he'd started falling and he opened his eyes to see T'Challa and Tony looking at him terrified. He closed his eyes again to block out the light.

"I need you to breathe with me Peter," Tony did the whisper yell thing again. Peter was having a panic attack. That's when Tony would do this. He would tell him to breathe. The office workers in the closet were both gasping for breath now. Peter heard every moan. He heard Pepper and Happy continue talking. Peter felt his hand against Tony's chest. It made itself sticky against the reactor and moved with Tony's breath.

One of the girls in the closet climaxed and Peter was sure his socks were cutting into his skin at this point. His blanket was so heavy. Shit, he didn't want to get rid of the blanket but it might stop his seams from digging into his shoulders. 

Peter heard Tony talking to him but he focused on T'Challa's breath. It was much more attainable than Tony's. Pepper and Happy were talking about Shuri. Happy had called her cute and Pepper was calling him out for not valuing her brain before her beauty. Happy was trying to say he meant it another way but Peter and Pepper both knew he was losing that argument.

Someone yelled at the girls in the closet and Peter jumped before forcing himself to pay attention to Tony. Her breath had gotten fast again and Tony's was still the same. In and out. Peter shifted his feet, forcing his shoes against his socks for a moment in order to pull his shoes off. The socks still scratched him, but they didn't poke into his skin quite as hard.

"There you go," Tony breathed out. His voice was crisp and clear. Peter felt the muscles around the reactor relax as much as they ever did. His heartbeat slowed back down. Captain Americas did too, but Tony was closer so Peter focused on him. 

"Eleven," Peter mumbled, feeling the dryness of his voice.

"I know kid," Tony whispered, "You have that spacey look to you. Can T'Challa or Steve carry you to your room?"

Peter's room was soundproof. Peter's bed has really smooth, weighted sheets. Peter's room could go completely dark. Peter needed to go there, so of course, he nodded. “Please,” He muttered.

He felt the grooves of Tony’s fingertips as the man gently pulled his hand away from the arc reactor. Peter put as much brainpower as he could into not sticking to the reactor and suddenly felt taken over by the amount of touch going on around him. Captain America had picked him up from the armpits and was pulling him closer. Before Peter could think to push away their chests were touching and Peter could feel every beat of the super-soldiers heart. It forced his head to throb with them. Happy had finally given into Pepper's argument. Now they were talking about Shuri’s brother. 

Peter let his eyes open again to see what was happening. Captain America was not carrying him. It was T’Challa. 

“Eleven?” Steve was behind T’Challa and his whisper was louder than T’Challa’s heartbeat. 

“Sensory input on a scale of one to ten,” Tony answered. His whisper was quieter. It was still louder than Pepper and Happy though.

“This normal for him?” His socks still itched.

“More than it is for other kids.” The girls were both fired. Apparently it would be a PR nightmare.

“It normally that sudden?” The sound dimmed a lot. Holy shit did the sound dim a lot.

“I think something started it, I don’t know what yet though. You stay out here, I’m gonna help get him into bed.”

Peter was in his room. It was soundproofed for this purpose. Tony must have closed the door because suddenly they were the only sounds coming in. His clothes still itched. The seams still dug into his shoulders which meant that his blanket was still on. It also probably meant he would need new shoulders. Wait that’s not how that works. 

“If you put him on the bed, I’m gonna help him get out of some of his clothes. I’ll be right back out.”

Peter smiled as much as his headache would allow. T’Challa let go of him and the world finally quieted down a bit. Tony helped him out of most of his clothes and got him into his bed which had the highest thread count Tony could get. He winced when the door opened and Steve's voice and heartbeat took over. Then the door closed and Peter felt how alone he was in the room. 

His heartbeat. His breath. His underwear pinched against his skin. The sheets were smooth but he could still pick out the threads now that all other input was gone. He could feel the wetness of his own tears though he was pretty sure he wasn't crying anymore. His head still pounded but even that was calming down and he was able to breathe easier through the pain.

He reached out of the sheets and felt for his blanket. Tony had taken it off. It was too prickly to the touch but Peter hadn't been without it since T'Challa had handed it to him and he didn't want to start now. He felt the vibranium itch against his skin. He let his finger stick to the blanket and pulled it underneath the sheets with him. The sensations at his fingertips lit up against his headache, but it gave him something to focus on. He felt the threads of the blanket until he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Severe sensory overload and a panic attack occur due (in part) to pressure from adult figures in Peter's life  
> TW: Mentions of grief/mourning
> 
> Please comment below!! Any support is appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One-Shot about Ben's work and Peter's personal life in the week leading up to Ben's death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings at the end
> 
> I know I promised Thursdays but I'm working on a big video project that I'll let you guys know about when I'm done (it's marvel related) so I forgot about it until a few minutes ago. Thursdays from now on (hopefully), unfortunately 1:30 am on a Saturday will have to work this time.
> 
> Please let me know if you want to see any one shots and I'll see if I can fit them in  
> The sequel is in the works but I'm still shuffling between ideas for main plots so let me know if there's anything you want to see  
> If you have any ideas as to what the long number at the end of his twitter handle is let me know!  
> Thanks for Reading!

ONE WEEK BEFORE BEN DIES

Ben had been working non-stop for the past few days. First it looked like Tony Stark had built a new suit. Then it looked like it was just a new color palette for his “Iron Legion.” Then it looked like the suits were trying to kill everyone and Ben started reaching out to Stark Industries for comment. So far no one high up had answered. 

Now Ultron had officially fallen and Sokovia was as safe as they could be on the ground. Stark Industries had suffered several pieces written by Ben, Ben's colleagues, and journalists from other papers suggesting that the new robots were part of a world domination scheme. Then Sokovia had been lifted from the ground and no opinion pieces knew how to talk about the destruction until the next day. 

Peter hadn’t been happy when Ben had written one of the nicer articles suggesting world domination. He had idolized Stark since they’d been to the Stark Expo many years ago. He didn’t like the idea of Iron Man being a bad guy. Since the first press conferences following Stark’s return from Afghanistan and the infamous Iron Man announcement Ben had written critical pieces about Stark. Peter had been writing Tony Stark and Captain America letters in crayon since he could. Peter’s letters normally failed to mention economic responsibility like Ben’s, but Peters were the ones that ended up on the fridge.

Right now the press community surrounding Tony Stark was waiting to hear back from Pepper Potts about a potential conference where they would answer questions and make announcements. Ben always prefered a one-on-one phone call, however, so did everyone else so this was probably best.

“We know anything yet?” May asked when he made it home at seven on a Wednesday.

“Not yet,” He put his bag down and pulled her into his arms. “Press conference here soon so I’m probably going to have to go to the tower tomorrow.”

May smiled, “You love saying that don’t you.”

“That I get to go to Stark Tower for work?” He kissed her forehead, “Absolutely I love saying that. Maybe they’ll have changed their badge system and I can bring a fake one home for Peter.”

“I think people who tinker as much as Peter does are the reason they don’t let you bring home your Stark badge.”

Ben laughed, “Yeah, I give him a good hour before he’d figured out the magnetic pattern or something and was able to get in on his own.”

May smiled and pulled him in closer. “He sounded like he had something he wanted to talk to us about.” 

“Tonight?” Ben asked.

“Well he wanted to make sure you weren’t to busy, and I don’t think he wants us to know that he has something to tell us, but probably as soon as we can all sit down for dinner or something.” May kept her voice quiet so that Peter didn’t hear.

“Did it sound bad?” Ben matched her volume.

May shook her head, “I don’t think so, he seemed nervous but not quite ‘killed a person’ nervous.”

“Not quite?”

May laughed in a way that always made Ben smile. “You know what I mean. I think it was a normal teenager nervousness.”

Ben nodded, “You guys already eat dinner tonight?”

“Yeah, I made pasta. There’s enough leftovers for you to either have dinner tonight or lunch tomorrow.”

Ben smiled and kissed May again and whispered seductively in her ear. “I love your pasta.”

May rolled her eyes but let out a laugh anyways. “I believe there’s an old saying about the fastest way to a man’s heart?”

Ben smiled and let go to start putting putting his coat away. “While that may be true, and your pasta is delicious, I mainly love it because it makes everyone else in the break room jealous.”

“They don’t get home-cooked pasta?”

“They don’t have an amazing wife.”

May rolled her eyes when Ben gave her another kiss on the cheek. “Did you already eat then?”

“Yeah, someone on the team brought in pizza for the late night. Good news is that the article is going through editing first thing in the morning but otherwise it’s done.”

“What’s it about?”

“Stark,” Ben shrugged, “It’s about the murder robots and the emergence of the new cape guy. We still don’t have answers on whether those events are related or if the new cape guy has a name so that the news doesn’t have to keep calling him ‘the new possible hero-the one who can fly but doesn’t have wings-he doesn’t have the red aura-yeah that one.’”

May rolled her eyes, “A room of journalists couldn’t think of a more defining characteristic than flight?”

Ben looked mock offended, “It’s all we’ve seen him do! He might be strong but we don’t have that on footage. He kind of appears to be naked but we don’t have any proof of that either. He’s got a cape. He doesn’t seem to be a suit. It’s not that guy with the wings from the Triskelion. It’s not the new girl who was involved in whatever that traffic mess in Seoul was. To many of them can fly May and this guy has been caught on public camera about four times.”

By this point May had lead him over to the couch where they sat down and he pulled out Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. “You’re cute when you get all mad about this stuff. You know that right?”

Ben rolled his eyes. “Did Peter need anything before we start reading?”

Man shook her head. “He’s been coming out every half hour for a snack, said he’s got a new system to work on homework and he’s taking a bunch of short breaks. I’ve read about it, I know a couple of students who can do it but we’ll see if he can get it.”

“I think he works better when he just kind of obsessed until he’s done.” Ben opened the book.

“He says he can’t do that for essays.”

“Oh, I could see that.” Ben almost started reading before he looked back up. “Did he want to talk tonight?”

May thought for a moment, “I think his paper is due tomorrow, so probably not.”

Ben nodded and started reading until they were both so tired that they had to go to bed.

The press conference happened late the next day. Pepper Potts and Tony Stark spoke of the events involving Ultron. Captain America discussed Sam Wilson, Vision, and Wanda and Pietro Maximoff. Natasha Romanoff discussed the unfortunate disappearance of Bruce Banner and the current efforts to find him. Unfortunately for most of the reporters, only Pepper and Captain America stayed for questioning and both were wonderful at spinning an answer without actually giving much away. 

The press conference didn’t end until six meaning Ben didn’t get home until a little before eight. 

“I’m home,” He called when he didn’t see May standing in the kitchen. “Kyle from editorial was very jealous of my pasta today.”

“Did you get to talk to Iron Man?” Peter asked. Ben turned to see him and May sitting together on the couch working on homework.

“I didn’t, I asked Captain America about the Falcon though which was fun.”

“What did he say?” May asked.

“Well I asked him if us not seeing him in the fight with Ultron meant he was a one time deal or if he was busy, and he sounded like it was mostly a busy thing. It seems The Falcon has a day job.”

“Really?” May asked.

“Either that or he’s running some secretive avengers stuff but that’s speculation so we’ll see what we print. We’re doing enough wild speculation at this point.”

“Anything big happen?” Peter asked. “Did you see the suit?”

“Not the suit,” Ben answered, “But Stark was wearing a kind of bulky watch that looked like it could be weaponized if needed.”

“That’s so cool,” Peter had a thoughtful look for a few moments. “But that means it’s not powered directly by the arc reactor right? So it would need some sort of alternate power if it could do anything. I wonder if it relies on more old-school weaponry then or if it still has his blaster.”

“I’d bet he doesn’t go back to guns,” Ben answered, “He hasn’t been seen by any press with a gun since Afghanistan. Curious about the power thing though, I wonder if it hooks back up to his chest if he needs it to get power or if it’s a small enough amount of energy that it doesn’t matter.”

Peter nodded lost in thought. Ben and May shared a smile and Ben joined them on the couch.

“How’s the homework situation tonight?” Ben asked May and Peter.

Peter shrugged, “I turned in my essay earlier so I have some calculus to do but it’s an easy unit.”

“May?” Ben asked.

“I’m still grading the presidency papers but it’s going faster than I thought.”

“Uhm-” Peter spoke before Ben could -“If you’re not busy then can I ask you guys something?” 

Ben tried to hide how shocked he was at Peter’s bluntness. The kid normally rambled for half an hour before getting to any given point. “You don’t have to wait until we’re not busy Pete, what’s up?”

“Uhm-” Peter looked back at his calculus notebook -“So I was uhm- well I was thinking about stuff and I just wanted to know if you guys knew what mom and dad thought about gay people.” 

Ben’s head reeled for a moment at the multiple layers to this question. “Uhm I believe the first thing to say is that no matter where this question is coming from, your aunt and I love you no matter what.”

“Absolutely,” May answered.

Peter nodded and smiled enough to let Ben know he could continue.

“Let me think if I ever heard them talk-” A distinct memory showed up and Ben forced himself not to physically react to the possible reprecutions. Richard had complained about ‘disgusting faggots,’ mutliple times while drunk. Mary had always shut him up or called him out, but the thoughts were there.

“Do you know the answer?” Peter asked looking starry eyed. This was going to crush him.

Ben looked at May but she shook her head. She didn’t remember, or wasn’t there for, his drunken rants.

“I do,” Ben answered, “Uhm, yeah.”

“Why are you saying it like that?” Peter asked.

“Your dad- well as you know they both worked in politics, so-”

“He hated gay people didn’t he?” Peter’s face had fallen. He looked torn.

“Of course not,” May said before Ben could answer. 

“May, he-” Ben took a deep breath and started before Peter could spiral any farther. “Politics around this were not the same as they are now. Your dad didn’t try to understand it, he didn’t think about it very critically, he just saw something that he’d grown up hearing about and he made some bad judgements about it. I would say that in 2001, when I heard him talk about it, he did not like the idea of gay mairrage being legalized but that doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t if he was alive today and had watched the discourse change.” 

Peter didn’t say anything so Ben continued.

“He also picked up a lot of bad opinions from our dad. Some of them were things that Mary or I talked him out of, some of them he still hadn’t shaken. I don’t think anything you could have done or said would have stopped him from looking at you like you were the best thing in the world.”

“But he didn’t like gay people?” Peter whispered.

Ben sighed, “I don’t know for sure. I watched him grow out of a lot of bad habits though Peter and I honestly think that by now he would have been ashamed of those opinions.”

“That doesn’t change them.” Peter said.

“It doesn’t.” Ben agreed.

“Peter they both loved you more than the world,” May said, “They- I don’t know I must not have been there when your dad talked about it but I can’t see that baseless of an opinion getting in the way of his love.”

Peter shrugged, not looking at either of them anymore.

Ben pulled him into his arms and May joined. They sat there for a few moments, taking in the conversation.

“I think I’m bisexual,” Peter whispered, still wrapped in their arms. “I- I don’t know but I really like this guy at school but I don’t think I’m gay because I still really liked Kate before she moved away and I don’t think that was fake because it kind of feels the same, and I talked to MJ about it because she passively attends a lot of clubs in order to see how the world works or something and I know one of them is the LGBT club and I told her, and she said that I probably was bisexual and I googled it the other day and I don’t know it feels right, but I don’t know and I don’t want Dad to hate me.”

Ben squeezed Peter tighter in his arms. “You could not do anything to get him to hate you. Nothing. He cleaned up your poop all the time. I watched you vomit chicken nuggets down one of his nicer suits right before a big meeting and he made sure you were okay before he finished getting cleaned up. He loved you so much Peter. He would have come around to it I promise.”

“And you’re not doing anything wrong,” May added, “You’re not doing anything wrong hon’.”

Peter nodded into their arms and started crying. “I- MJ said she was sure you guys would be cool with it, and-” He took a deep breath, -“And I knew you would be cool with it, because we went to that parade a few months ago, and you guys were really upset you couldn’t make it to that teachers wedding and it was two girls, but I- I don’t know, you read so many stories online when you look up this kind of stuff and some people end up homeless and-”

“Your parents would not have kicked you out.” Ben answered the question Peter didn’t want to ask. “I promise you. No matter what your dad’s opinion of you became. Even if May and I are totally wrong and he never changed his mind, your Mom would have kicked your dad out before you.” 

Peter smiled a bit at this.

“Your mother,” May continued, “Was the biggest ‘no-bullshit’ woman I have ever met. If she didn’t like how something was being handled she told someone and she changed something. That’s how she got into political spheres so well. She was a woman who didn’t take no for an answer. If anyone suggested you were less because sometimes you had crushes on boys she would have made sure you knew she cared more about you than she cared about their opinion. I promise.”

“Really?”

“To a fault,” Ben laughed, “She got in trouble once because she hung up on someone from the white house because they suggested that Wakanda would be better off with severe Democratic US intervention.”

Peter smiled brighter and Ben ruffled his hair. “We love you kiddo okay, nothing’s gonna change that.”

“I love you too,” Peter said.

“Did May make dinner again tonight?” Ben asked him. 

“Ben there are take out containers on the coffee table in front of you.” Peter answered. Ben looked up and there were in fact several empty take out containers amidst the piles of graded essays.

“Yeah I don’t have anything to defend that.”

“Aren’t you an investigative journalist?” Peter asked.

“Hey!” Ben laughed, “I’ll have you know I questioned Captain America himself today.”

“And the answer you got was super boring,” Peter was laughing a bit now too.

“Low blow Peter,” Ben smiled, “The truth isn’t always flashy.”

Peter rolled his eyes, “Ben you write about superheroes and the answer you got was that Captain America’s friend also has a day job.”

Ben laughed again and pulled Peter in tight, “Sorry, next time I’ll make sure to figure out exactly what type of breakfast sandwich they all like and get it super boring.”

“Next time you need to ask Tony Stark about his watch.” 

“Yeah and get laughed at by all the other reporters in the room who are asking about world events.”

“Tony Stark doesn’t have a permit to carry that watch and if it is a weapon then it can do just as much harm as a gun. These are the real questions Ben. It’s concealed carry and he’s the only one who has it.”

“You’re your parents kid for figuring out that angle but unfortunately the trials that we watched when you were ten ruled that he doesn't need to hand any of that information over to the government yet. Maybe now after the whole Sokovia affair, but right now I have no legal ground to accuse him over anything. My producer also wouldn’t like it if I suggested we write a piece on Iron Man’s watch in the middle of all this.”

Peter rolled his eyes. “Fine. After all this is over. Ask Iron Man where he buys his watch. I bet he says he made it himself.”

“I bet he does Peter.” Ben smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: LGBT coming out scene where all involved parties are supportive but a potentially non-supportive parent is discussed. happy ending
> 
> It deeply hurts me to say that this is by far the most LGBT+ representative chapter in the story. I had to squeeze it in because I wanted my story to be at least a little queer but I couldn't find time in the pacing for a romantic plot for any character and any other mentioning of it is really small.   
> Don't worry though because in the sequal we will have plotlines that (at least a little) involve the LGBT of 1 or 2 asexual people, 4 bisexual or gay people, 1 gender non-binary individual, and possibly a transgender individual. There will (probably) be a variety of coming out stories, as well as a variety of romantic and sexual encounters (not sex between the underage people, but looking back in one shots as I do in this story) I have several of the scenes already written but they just don't fit with the story so the sequel will be SUPER queer. 
> 
> Comments are super helpful! You guys are amazing!! Thank you so much!!!!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Tony bond post-sensory episode

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: A little bit more grief and mourning. Not as much as before
> 
> Thanks for all the support, I'm happy to say that this is getting out on Thursday, as is regularly scheduled!

ONE WEEK BEFORE THE ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF BEN'S DEATH

“Peter, I have been asked to wake you up so that you will be able to easily fall asleep tonight.” Fridays voice was as quiet as possible, but it woke Peter up in his otherwise silent room.

“How long was I asleep?” He mumbled. He opened his eyes to be reminded of the pitch black. “Lights to three percent.”

The lights barely turned on, but it was enough to start getting dressed. “You were asleep for three hours. Would you like me to slowly turn the lights to fifty percent? I can stop if it becomes painful.”

“Yeah,” Peter muttered. He pulled his shirt on over his head. The noise the fabric made was loud in the silent room. “Could you put on some white noise or something?’

“Of course Peter.” Friday said, followed by the sound of seagulls at the beach.

A minute later, May was calling and Peter answered quickly. Tony had likely texted her about his sensory overload.

“Hey May.”

“Hey Petey, how are you feeling? Tony sounded like it was pretty bad.”

Peter winced a bit at the description. It was accurate, but it was always weird to hear about how much others could tell. 

“It was I, I think between last night and then T’Challa’s at the tower, and they started talking about how old Spiderman was and I don’t know. It was just a lot.”

May was quiet for a little bit, “Do they not know you’re spiderman? Or could they just not talk about it because T’Challa was there?”

“Only Tony, Rhodey, Pepper, and Happy know it’s me.” Peter began walking up and down his room as his brain continued to wake up.

“I don’t think I knew that,” May didn’t sound mad, but Peter could tell she was thrown off. “You don’t think you can trust the Avengers with that?”

Peter shrugged. “I just don’t think anyone really gets anything out of them knowing. Tony gets bad press every time he works with me because I’m not signing all the paperwork they’re figuring out. Captain America’s thoughts on how little, uhm, how little Spiderman’s parents knew about the whole thing are what kind of pushed me over the edge at lunch. I don’t know, I just-”

“It’s okay Peter,” May’s voice was soft, “I’m not asking you to tell them. That’s your choice. As long as Tony knows, and knows that he answers to me if something happens to you, then that’s all I can ask.”

Peter smiled. He really did love her. “T’Challa’s younger sister told me not to let you or Pepper hang the tapestry on the wall. She said that it's something silly that Americans do.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I might have had it over my shoulders when she first saw me, and I got all awkward about it so she told me to calm down. She’s really cool.”

“Yeah?” May had her you’re-talking-about-a-new-girl voice on.

“May stop. Please. She is not my girlfriend. She will not be my girlfriend. I cannot survive high school promising everyone that I’m dating an African Princess. And also I’m not into her like that. It’s more of a ‘I’ll tell you how to make carbon based webbing if you tell me how to make it better with vibranium’ type of relationship.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll back off. I’ve got Ned on my side anyways. He’ll tell me if you’ve got a crush on her later.” 

Mays lack of knowledge of his previous crush on MJ proved her wrong, but she didn’t need to know that. “Alright May, you do that. I think we’re doing dinner soon so I’m going to go find Tony.”

“Are you coming home tonight?” She asked before he could hang up.

“Uhm, can I get back to you on that? Tony’s going to be weird about my sleep schedule and might make up some excuse to keep me here where Friday can watch me. I do want to come home.”

“Sounds good, keep me posted. If you guys end up having a movie night or something let me know, maybe I’ll come meet this girl who can keep up with your science mumbo jumbo. Would that be okay?”

Peter felt his muscles relax. That was exactly what he needed. If May came then he could be with her but he wouldn’t have to miss out on any time learning from Shuri or hearing her call Tony’s engineering ‘pretty good for an American.’

“May that would actually be awesome. I think it would calm Tony down too.”

She smiled, “I bet it would. Alright, go back to dinner now.”

“Will do, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Alright, larb you.”

“Larb you too.”

A few minutes later, Peter left the room to go down to the labs before dinner.

Despite his protests that the nap had given him a second wind, Tony and T’Challa spent a majority of the hour acting as though Peter was about to break.

“Don’t try me kid,” Tony had called out when Peter tried to sit down and work again. 

They’d been touring Tony’s parts of the lab. Shuri was delighted by the new ideas around her but had ways which she knew Tony could benefit. She swore up and down that it wasn’t an intellect problem, but a need for a new set of eyes.

“You can’t expect one person to come up with the perfect solution to a problem this big all on their own.” Shur said when Tony had showed her the way the fuel line connected into the gauntlets. “Sure you’re solutions are brilliant. They work, and they’re efficient. But sometimes a second look from a new perspective is good. Also Vibranium could help stabilize a few elements to give you a bit more flight time between recharges.”

“Show me how,” Tony had answered. Peter, who was still not allowed to work despite his protests, resolved to texting Ned. 

After Ben had died, and Peter’s panic attacks started, Ned had started worrying. Ned wanted to know everything, but Peter couldn’t be expected to tell everything. After a few months of figuring out a balance they worked their way into a system. Ned wanted to know when it got bad. If Peter told him about sensory episodes, sleepless nights, and panic attacks then Ned would let him lead the discussion about everything else. The little things were up to Peter if he shared. 

Peter hadn’t felt like he’d needed to tell Ned when he’d barely slept the last night. The whole ‘King of Wakanda knew my parents’ thing would come up later, and Peter didn’t have the energy to explain why he was so drained by it. However a sensory episode that caused him to lose most human functions for a bit, Ned got a text as soon as Peter’s eyes readjusted to his phone screen.

Ned hadn’t responded right away, but by the time Peter was in the lab, he’d responded asking if something had happened. After that Peter had started updating him with everything from the last two nights. He walked Ned through his shock of the King of Wakanda knowing Peter’s parents before he told him about lunch with Captain Steve. Ned didn’t have any answers for Peter, but that worked fine. Peter could got to May or Tony if he needed help. Ned was really good at just listening. 

Peter was halfway through a message describing the blanket that he had over his shoulders when Tony called him away from just phone.

“Peter, if you want to quit texting your girlfriend I told Shuri you'd show her how the webbing works.”

"I was texting Ned, but he'd be flattered." Peter stood up and walked to the trip. "Am I showing her how it's made or how it works?" 

“How it works, and only how it works please. Can’t go giving her all our secrets.”

Shuri protested, “Scientific innovation thrives on the sharing of secrets.”

Tony gave her a look. “You do not have any room to talk Missy.”

“We are changing because of that! What do you call the last few hours Mr. Stark?”

“Alright, alright,” Tony smirked at her, “We can’t give you the information yet because it’s not ours to give, and because the military likes to try and grab everything that comes out of this building.” Tony gave her a bit of a solemn look, “We have to be careful with what we give them or they’ll start trying to get Spider Man's blood samples and I really wish I was exaggerating.”

“Blood Samples?” Peter asked terrified. “What the hell, uhm, what the hell do they want with uhm with his blood?”

Tony gave him a look. “The exact same thing they wanted with Captain America’s. They want to make an army out of him.”

Peter paled, “oh.”

Tony nodded, “Wanna put Spideys wrist things on and shoot out some webs for her to look at?”

Peter forced himself to smile and shoot a web at the table. He did this several times with several different settings before taking the shooters off and showing the webbing to Shuri. She asked hundreds of questions about strength testing and quality. He answered as much as Tony would allow him to. The two went on for a while, until T’Challa was called away on a phone call that Shuri was asked to come with.

“How you doing kid?” Tony asked after they’d left the room. “Wanna talk about earlier?”

Peter avoided the second question. “I’m doing okay. May told me that if we do a movie night tonight she’ll try to make it.”

“She’s gonna join us at the tower?” Tony asked surprised, “Your aunt?”

“Yeah, she’s been here-” He thought for a moment, “Has she never hung out here before?”

“It’s partly an appearances thing,” Tony explained, “You’re supposed to just be an intern so having your aunt over would be weird.”

“She’s more than an aunt though.” Peter didn’t know why he felt the need to explain this to Tony. The man knew what May meant to him.

Tony’s face went a little bit softer. “I know Peter, it would be the same either way. The problem is that it’s an intern having family over, not that it’s your aunt.” Tony gave him an odd look, “Having a movie night might be a good idea though, giving you and May some time together without having to pry you away from Shuri.”

Peter smiled. “That’s what I was thinking earlier. And she’s already met T’Challa.”

“That’s still weird to me.”

“You didn’t have the King of Wakanda randomly show up in your tiny Queens apartment. I thought it was like when you came over and wanted me to come fight or something!”

“I thought you knew it was a family friend thing.”

“All rational thoughts flew out the window when I saw him.”

“Well I’m a little impressed that you had rational thoughts to begin with.”

Peter rolled his eyes, “The King of Wakanda showed up at my house and cried with me in my kitchen. Give me a little bit of credit.”

Tony smiled. “Fine, I’ll give you that. Question, that blanket has vibranium in it yeah? That’s why they waited so long to give it to you.” 

Peter nodded. He grabbed the blanket off of his nearby workbench that he’d set it on. “Yeah, I think we have the old one they gave us in storage somewhere. It’s not quite as heavy as this one but I remember it was really soft. May and Ben wrapped me up in it on the way out of the funeral home because I was shivering so bad.”

“Was it cold out that they wrapped you in a tapestry?” Tony’s voice was soft, making Peter’s week voice sound better.

“No, I was just really tired and hadn’t been eating much. I didn’t take it well, I didn’t talk for a few days after that.” Peter swallowed harshly, trying not to start crying. The sadness washed over him quickly. He’d seen Ben’s body right after it happened. He held Ben’s hand as the blood drained out of him and the police slowly showed up. He hadn’t talked for a few days after that either.

Tony put a hand on Peters shoulder for a few moments before pulling him into a hug. They hadn’t done this before. Peter had mistook something for a hug in the car after Berlin, but they hadn’t done it for real yet. He tried not to think about Ben. He tried to focus on Tony giving him a hug, but he couldn’t stop seeing his cheeks lose color. He let out a small sob into Tony’s shoulder and felt Tony pull him in closer. 

Ben couldn’t hold him like this anymore. Ben gave the best hugs. May knew that, because her and Peter would fight to get to sit by Ben on movie nights because he was the best person to sit by at movie nights. Now May and Peter held each other tight.

Tony’s hugs were okay. Peter could tell he wasn't used to hugging people he didn’t want to flirt with. He’d seen him hug Pepper all the time, but right now Tony’s hands froze around Peters upper back. Peter squiremed underneath him just enough to hug him back, and see if he could teach Tony how to hug family. Peter let out another sob and Tony seemed to pick up on some of his tips, pulling him even tighter and allowing his hands to move a little bit around Peters back and shoulders. 

“I wish I could make this better for you kid. But this week is probably just going to suck.” Tony said.

Peter nodded, another small sob coming out.

“I wish I could have met him you know, I think about that sometimes. How much I would like to meet someone who your aunt thought fit to take care of you. She’s got crazy high standards you know. I’m a billionaire and I still worry that she thinks I’m not gonna be able to give you everything you deserve. Ben must have been a hell of a guy to keep up with you two.”

Peter just nodded into Tony, probably ruining his good shirt with the amount of crying he was doing.

“You wanna hear about my day at work yesterday?” Tony asked, loosening his grip a little bit. “It’s got nothing to do with this, but I think a distraction would help.”

Peter nodded, pulling away a bit and wrapping himself up in the Wakandan tapestry. He tried to fight through the grief and the memories. He focused on Tony’s words.

“It’s been a lot of little things lately. I’ve been getting some good data from my latest test runs so Fridays been working on storing that. We’ve got a second version of Veronica officially launched and ready for a disaster out in space.” Tony thought for a moment as he led the two to the couch to sit down as they talked. “Oh we had a PR problem today. I dealt with some of it while you napped. We ran some numbers and due to a problem with a guy in human resources we only had three employees at Stark industries who were not straight cis-gendered people. So we-”

“Four.” Peter mumbled, leaning deeper into Tony.

“What?”

“Four. I’m technically officially registered as an intern. You had four non-straight people hired through you.” Peter clarified.

Tony sat still for a second. “This is how you’re doing this?” He asked casually, “Not mad or weirded out or anything just, actually, you know what you impulsively saying this while emotionally exhausted is exactly how I’d expect you to come out to me. Whatever. Anyways, so we only had three non-straight employees that we knew of.” Tony paused leaning back.

“Wait so does that mean you and Ned are a thing?” He asked.

Peter laughed a bit, “No, Ned and I are not a thing. I haven’t really hardcore crushed on any guys. Guys my age are all awful.”

“Okay, okay, fair enough. Anyways, only three employees, and we had to fire two of them today because one of them is the others boss and someone walked in on them having sex in a closet during the day. So we’re already working on suggesting HR hires more not straight cis-gendered people, especially scientists. Stark Industries needs to be obviously pro-love. I hear the lead of research and development even made sure his intern wasn’t straight.”

“I hear he did a lousy job of checking,” Peter mumbled.

“Hey I didn’t rush you, and to be fair I didn't think bringing up your homecoming date was a good idea.”

Peter winced. “Fair enough.”

Tony smiled and kept going. “We had a goon from Research and development blow himself and a miniature arc reactor up. He’s okay but the room needs to be double checked for all sorts of radiation stuff and he’s in containment because of it. It should be fine though. Uhm, the board talked to me again about relooking at a weapons contract with the US government. I told them no. Wakandan King came over to talk Accords bullshit with Ross, but we actually started getting somewhere. Found out new stuff regarding a project that Shuri is helping Captain America with.”

Peter remembered the first part of the conversation at lunch all the sudden. “What does Ross want Spiderman to do?”

Tony sighed. “You know I was hoping you’d forget that.”

“I didn’t,” Peter said needlessly. When Tony didn’t respond he continued. “What does he want?”

“There’s some bills and international treaties that are coming up.” Tony sighed, falling back into the couch and away from Peter a bit. “We’re doing it slower this time, each country is kind of getting their own rules and we’re being treated like a quote ‘international but US based organization.’ which is angering some people and enjoyable to others. Ross wants you in on all the signing.”

“Does he know I’m not leaving Queens?” Peter asked, sitting up a bit straighter.

“I keep telling him that. He says you went to Berlin.”

“That was a one time thing!”

“Kid you don’t need to convince me I know. He’s just worried that there will be more of them. I also think he wants you to accidentally sign one of the treaties that won’t allow masked vigilantes. This was important before Banner was widely known as the Hulk, and before Natasha and Clint had SHIELDS secrets poured out. Now you’re the only real masked vigilante and Ross doesn’t like not knowing who you are.”

“Does everyone else want to know too?” Peter asked.

“They wouldn’t mind it, but Nat and Clint are both under the impression that if they know less there's less to give up. Wanda only wants to get to know Spiderman because you’re both younger. Sam and Cap want to know you because you fought them and I think they want to get a better feel for who you are.”

“Would they like me?” Peter asked quietly. “Captain America didn’t seem to like, uhm, he didn’t like that I still, well that I still hadn’t told my parents.”

“Woah kid, woah,” Tony pulled back. “Steve doesn’t know anything about you. He was mad at me. Not you. He didn’t like that I’d taken you. Do you know how many times he enlisted in the army before the Doctor and my dad found him? Don’t try to guess because it’s seventeen. It’s illegal to lie on your enlistment form. He did it anyways.

“He was only eighteen years old and he underwent a series of experiments by a good doctor and my self-obsessed father without any second thought. He has no right to be mad at you because you’re just like he was, okay? He’s mad at me because he wants you to be as safe as possible. He’s been mad at me for much dumber reasons before. None of us want you hurt, that’s all that was.”

Peter nodded into Tony, curling back into him and letting Tony relax a bit before he started talking. “I really don’t think I could handle Captain America hating me right now.” He said quietly. “He’s Captain America.”

Tony ruffled Peter’s hair, “He doesn’t hate you Peter, and he doesn’t hate Spiderman." 

After a few more minutes of Tony talking about his day, the two let Aunt May know she was good to come over for a movie night, and then went to the kitchen for dinner. Tony promised they’d stay away from all Spiderman related conversation in order to ensure no aggravation of mental health problems. The conversation flowed smoothly between the assortment of adults as they discussed the boring parts of international politics, as well as the movie selection for the night. The movie conversation ended quickly when Natasha said that it was a mystery and no one at the table was brave enough to ask what that meant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you thought in the comments below!!  
> Also I have yet to hear from anyone who has tried to figure out what his twitter code means so if you figure that out or want a hint, I'd love to hear about it!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter invents new technology and deals with the loss of Ben.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of little trigger warnings, listed at the end  
> TW: Grief and mourning  
> Thanks for all the support! I hope you enjoy

2 MONTHS AFTER BEN'S DEATH

May tries not to think about how much she suddenly doesn’t know about her nephews life. He had always talked to Ben more. Peter talks to her more now than he did in the immediate weeks following the shooting. He had been silent for days afterwards. It had been two months now, and he was talking more. He still wasn’t rambling like he used to be, but he would tell her about his day at school.

Peter had started sneaking out sometime in his silent stretch. Either that or he’d been much better about it before. Either way she heard the window open at one in the morning and then he’d fumble around in his room for a few minutes before going to sleep. He worried her.

May was fairly certain he wasn’t doing drugs. She didn’t dare search his room when he wasn’t there because she didn’t want to cross a privacy line when he was at a weird age and dealing with such extreme grief. She did however fiddle with a lot of things and move a lot of books when she would go in there with him. He never seemed to notice, so she figured if there were drugs they weren’t hiding close to his bed.

She also knew that after his father and his grandfather he was likely predisposed to addiction, and she would have been noticing symptoms. This scared her a little bit because the trauma of watching a- the trauma Peter had been through had caused a large variety of behavioral changes, but none of them quite made him seem high so she tried not to worry about it.

None of these assurances made her any more comfortable with the fact that Peter was hiding things from her.

The weird behavior compounded when Ned texted her halfway through a Wednesday saying that Peter had been buried in a notebook all day. 

Peter had started keeping some of his notebooks secret from her soon after Ben died. May assumed this was simply his trying to write out his feelings and not wanting her to know about it. Ned told her he’d seen some of it and it looked sciency. This confused but didn’t concern May. She was momentarily worried that Peter was making drugs, but she pushed that thought away when she remembered his reaction to the way Ned’s parents casually drank alcohol. May and Ben rarely drank, and he seemed floored that some people did any version of any drug at any sort of regular interval.

When Peter came home, after having apparently spent his whole school day nose deep in a notebook scribbling stuff down, he went straight to his room. He didn’t say ‘hi’ to May, he didn’t grab a snack, and he didn’t drop his backpack off in the kitchen. 

May had thought he’d stopped isolating himself this much two weeks ago. She’d finally gotten him to talk to her again when he came home, to tell her about his day and about decathlon. They’d made so much progress and May was terrified of moving backwards on this.

She sat in the kitchen for a few minutes. Last night he’d sat next to her in the living room while she graded tests. Something in his reading sparked a PTSD attack and they’d worked through it. She hoped he wasn’t worried it would happen again.

She stood up, taking a deep breath and trying to get something of an answer out of him.

“Peter?” She called into his room.

“Not dying, just think I’m onto something.” He said.

“What kind of something?”

“Uh, a science kind of something.”

“What kind of science?”

“Uhmmm,” Peter started to answer but must have gotten side tracked. That was fairly normal for him.

“Peter?”

“Yeah?”

“You okay?”

“Yeah I- Ummm- Yeah one second.” 

May waited by the door for a few minutes before giving a knock. “Peter? You’re kind of worrying me hon’.”

“Sorry!” May heard a bit of shuffling and the door opened again. He looked exhausted. He looked like he hadn’t gotten a good night's sleep in a few weeks. He looked like he was barely holding himself together. But for the first time in weeks May saw a bit of fire behind his eyes. He was onto something. “Sorry May, I- I’m trying to figure out if I’m on the right track with this and it kind of makes sense but it’ll sound stupid if I tell you right now so I- uhm, can I like grab a banana and then keep going?”

May stared at him. It had nearly counted as a science rant. She smiled at him. “Yeah, go for it. I- Yeah if you’ve got something go for it. Don’t forget to do your homework, but you said you’d already caught up in that so I- yeah go ahead.”

Peter gave her most of a genuine smile and pulled her into a tight hug.

She hugged him back. They both knew Ben still gave the best hugs, but they both knew they wouldn’t get a hug from Ben so they held each other instead.

“I love you,” she whispered.

“I love you too,” He whispered back.

Peter spent the rest of his night in his room bent over a notebook. He kept his door open though which was calming. From what she could tell he didn’t sneak out that night.

The next couple days he came home, did his homework in the living room while May corrected papers, then went into his room to work on whatever this side project was. May texted Rubie to see if Ned was doing the same, and she said he wasn’t. This meant Peter was doing this all on his own which slightly worried her. 

“Can I ask what you’re doing?” she said when he’d spent most of his Saturday morning in his room and only came out for lunch. “Or is it still to weird?

“It’s still too weird,” Peter said between bites of an apple. “It’s also not chemistry so I keep getting stuck.”

May gave him an odd look but allowed him to keep his secret.

Saturday night he seemed to try and hide a sensory overload episode from her so she didn’t press the issue when he didn’t come out of his room on Sunday.

Monday, May took a nap on the couch right after work. She barely heard Peter come home. 

She woke up to him shaking her softly. She opened her eyes and he was crying. She sat up quickly and pulled him into a hug. They sat there for a few minutes and she kept holding him.

“I figured it out,” Peter muttered eventually, “The science thing.”

“Yeah?” May asked.

“Yeah.”

“There any reason you’re crying then?” She asked even though she felt she already knew the answer.

“Ben would have loved it.” Peter choked out. “He- He would have gone nuts.” 

May held him tight. “Want to tell him later?” May asked, “We can go out to the cemetery again, Ned might want to come, he still hasn’t been back and his mom said he’d been meaning to.”

Peter nodded. “I want to tell you first, I- I mean I want to tell Ben first but I-” Peter flinched into her. More than her the memory of Ben’s death seemed to physically hurt him.

“I know hon’, I know.” May rubbed his back. “What were you working on?” She whispered.

“Arc Reactor technology.” Peter whispered back.

This took May by complete surprise. “Really?”

“Yeah, I- well at school we talked about it as an alternative to fossil fuels, and then I got thinking about how it could have happened, and I think Ned saw me googling stuff and I-” Peter curled into her tighter and got really quiet for a few moments. “I don’t know I started thinking about it, and then I kinda got an idea,” He was quiet again, “Then I started writing it down and then I couldn’t stop.”

“So you figured out arc reactors?” May asked quietly. She was shocked to hell, but that wasn’t what he needed right now.

He nodded into her, “I figured out why it hasn’t been miniaturized them yet,” He whispered, “Or I think I did, but I fixed most of the problem, I just need to design a cooling chamber to go around them.”

“Yeah?” She asked quietly.

“Yeah but that would need experimentation with stuff I don’t have.”

“Could we get it for you?” If he was going to get into this she was going to support every goddamn second of it.

“Not unless you want to go on a terrorist watch list,” Peter muttered. “He probably uses Palladium or something. Though that would probably harm his heart if he kept it there for too long, I don’t know.”

May was crying too. “You’re right Peter,” she whispered trying not to let her voice shake, “Ben would have gone crazy over this.”

Peter nodded. “Can we go see him?” he asked, “I’m done with homework.”

“Already?” May asked. 

“I finished it during school, it wasn’t a lot and I knew I was close on the arc reactor stuff.” Peter said.

“Yeah, then we can go see him. Why don’t you call Ned and see if he wants to come. Rubie sounded like he’d been thinking about going but didn’t want to intrude. This way you can tell him if you want.”

He nodded into her again. They sat there for a few minutes together. She felt Peter slowly start to fidget into her as his body grew tense. He started shaking with sobs just like his uncle and father did.

“I can’t stop watching it,” he breathed out. May’s heart tore. “I can’t stop seeing it- seeing the way it- it,” Peter let out a sob. “It’s been two months, why can’t I sleep without seeing it?” 

May ran a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry baby,” She whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“I- I don’t think they’re gonna find the guy who did it.” Peter said. “I really don’t. They have to have stopped looking by now.”

May squeezed him tighter. Peter was right. 

They sat there together for a few minutes before Peter moved to text Ned and the three of them made their way to the cemetery to tell Ben.

Ned was the first one to suggest Peter find a way to let Tony Stark knows about this. Peter brushed the idea off as ridiculous. Him and May still hadn’t said Tony Stark’s name since Ben died, nevertheless tried to contact him. May brought out Ben’s old laptop and started looking for a way to get the idea out to Stark. She found a September Foundation application. It wasn’t exactly asking for people like Peter, but she got him to sign up and write everything down anyways. Two days later he liked what he’d written about the reactor enough to hit send. 

May spent the next two days assuring Peter that the worst thing that will happen is the billionaire will ignore him. The stress of the day lead to an exhausting sensory overload episode which ended with Peter hiding in the bathtub where the least amount of noise could get in.

May longed for Ben to be able to sit outside the bathroom with Peter that night. She longed for her husband to help him out of his clothes so that he could stop worrying about how much they scratched his skin. She longed for Ben’s greater ease at talking with Peter who should probably be seeing a counselor of some sort.

She called Peter in sick to school the next day, and took half a day for herself, allowing a substitute to teach her first few periods. They held each other most of the morning. Ben was still the best at giving hugs.

From there Peter started talking to a counselor at school. He saw her before classes every Wednesday. May didn’t know if Peter would open up, but she was running out of ways to help him work through his trauma and get a good night's sleep. She also hoped that with her confidentiality Peter would be willing to talk to her about his going out at night. That started back again after he figured out the arc reactor tech. 

THREE MONTHS AFTER BEN'S DEATH

“May?” Peter called into the living room. It had been a few weeks since he’d sent in the application.

“Yeah?” She was in a rhythm grading exams and didn’t want to stop unless he needed her.

“Do I have to keep seeing the girl at school?” 

May sighed and set down her pen. She walked over to his door to see him sitting at his desk with his head laying on his arms. The lines on his face suggested he’d just woken up. “That can’t have been comfortable.”

He looked at his arms, shrugged and looked back at her. “All she does is tire me out, I took a nap through chemistry today in the nurse's office but it didn’t really help.”

May nodded, that didn’t surprise her too much. “You were worried about screaming in the nurse's office?” She asked softly. She let herself walk in the door and pull him into a hug.

“Yeah,” he whispered, “I just- I don’t know May I can’t sleep, and then I have to go in early on Wednesdays and all she does is makes, she makes me-” Peter paused for a moment trying to figure out where to go next. “It’s exhausting.” He said.

"She supposed to help give you some ideas of how to sleep better, how to work through some of the flashbacks and stuff." May tried.

"All she wants to do is hear what happened." Peter seemed frustrated, "I asked her how to stop freaking out every time someone talked about gun control in government and she told me that I needed to work through everything but I- May I can't just stop thinking about it, I need something that can start helping, it doesn't need to be a miracle or anything, I'm not asking for a one time thing, I know- I know this shit takes time. I just feel like she doesn't know what she's doing." Peter was on the verge of a small breakdown.

“We could try emailing your government teacher about it.” May said.

“He pulled me aside after class the other day,” Peter said quietly, “I- Yeah he said he’d give me at least a days warning if he saw it coming up again, that I could excuse myself or study in the library or something.”

“That’s a good start.” 

“Yeah but it- it’s really- It’s a bandaid solution. I want to feel like I’m like- I don’t know I feel like I never know what’s happening in my head until I’m about to start panicking or suddenly everything gets loud, and I- I know that really stresses you out because I can hear your heart start to race but I just- I don’t even know how to know it’s coming, never mind how to deal with it when it gets there. I- I don’t know May I just feel like I live every day terrified of my memories and I just want a hug from Ben but I can’t because every time I think of that I watch him die and-” Peter was sobbing, “And I can’t stop seeing it happen.”

May squeezed him tightly and tried to think of what she could say. 

“Do I have PTSD?” He whispered. “I- I think I might and I asked the counselor and she said she wasn’t allowed to give diagnoses.”

“I think you do hon’,” May said, “You watched something awful and your brains probably struggling to figure out exactly what to make of it. That’s okay.”

Peter nodded mindlessly, “Ned told me the same thing at lunch today when I told him that the counselor didn’t give me a good answer. ”

“We maybe need to see what my insurance can do about getting you a not-school therapist of sorts.” 

Peter shrugged. “I don’t know, I- maybe if I actually put in the name I can google some stuff for how to deal with stuff.”

“You can’t google this away Peter.” May said.

He smirked a bit, “I can try.”

May rolled her eyes. “Peter you-” She sighed.

“I know, I know, just, I don’t think I want to talk to anyone right now I- I’ll keep talking to her Wednesday morning if you want, I just- I just don’t want to- I don’t think it’s really helping.”

May ran a hand through Peter’s hair and pulled him close. “I don’t know how I feel about letting you stop, I don’t want it to be making things worse, but I’m really worried about you.”

“I’m okay May,” Peter groaned.

She forced herself not to laugh. “You want to run that by me again Peter? I know I’m not okay, I don’t know how you could be. If you were I’d probably be even more worried about you. This is supposed to suck Peter. There’s nothing good about it.”

Peter nodded into her and they sat on the bed together for a while. She thought about how much it would hurt their income to get Peter into a therapist's office. Ben had been the breadwinner for the family. Her teachers income wasn’t going to be able to pay rent here, so she’d already been looking at new apartments to move to before Ben’s life insurance and pension ran out. Peter didn’t know this yet, but May suspected he’d begun figuring things out.

She would look into the insurance aspect as soon as she could, but likely they wouldn’t support anything until Peter saw his physician and got an official diagnosis. His physical wasn’t due for another couple months and the insurance probably wouldn’t let her move it forward. She really didn’t know what to do if he didn’t start sleeping better. They were both lucky he was successful enough in school, and liked enough by his teachers, that he wasn’t facing any grade problems following Ben’s death.

They sat there for a few minutes before May coaxed him into the living room where they both did schoolwork as best they could. She got him to eat dinner with her and she smiled when he ate a second sandwich before going back to his room where he closed his door.

9 MONTHS AFTER BEN’S DEATH

Tony Stark was in May’s living room.

Tony Stark was in May’s living room and she had absolutely no idea what to do about it. It had been months since Peter had applied for the September foundation. When they didn’t hear back in a few weeks they’d stopped hoping for it. Yet here Stark was. He said he was here about the Foundation, and he said he was here for Peter. 

May almost asked what he thought about Peter’s arc reactor technology when the door finally opened. May always beat Peter home from school but normally it wasn’t by quite this much. He must have taken a longer walk home. He’d been doing that recently and May wasn’t sure if it really did help him calm down or if it was related to his sneaking out at night. She pushed the thoughts aside.

“Peter,” she called as he walked in and walked straight to the kitchen to put his backpack down. 

“Hey May,” he still hadn’t looked over to see her today. “There was a weird looking car outside, like fancy weird not clown car we-” He stopped as he spotted Tony Stark in their living room. “Uhmm-” 

“Hey kid,” Stark interrupted, “I was just talking to your aunt here about your application to the September Foundation,” May saw Tony wink as though there was a secret being shared. “I figured I’d drop by and talk to you about what’s coming out of it and what our next steps are. What do you say?”

Peter stared at Tony Stark. He glanced at May. Then he stared at Tony Stark for another moment. “The- uhm, you’re here for the September Foundation?”

Tony winked again and stood up, “Can I talk to him in private for a little bit, the stuff on his application was legendary but there's a lot of secrecy things we’re worried about. I want to talk scheduling with him.”

May nodded. “Go ahead, yeah,” She gave Peter a look and he shrugged before following Tony Stark into his room.

May had never longed so much to be able to hear through the wall into Peter’s room. Tony Stark was here. Tony Stark was talking to Peter, and hopefully giving him an opportunity. He hadn’t seemed mad with Peter. He seemed like he just wanted to talk.

Peter and Tony came out several minutes later. 

Tony was bringing Peter to Germany for a conference. She thought about how much it would mean to Peters academic career to be invited to an event in another country by someone like Tony Stark. Of course she let him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Severe grief and mourning  
> TW: Mention of panic attacks, nightmares, and sensory overload  
> TW: Mentions of drugs and alcohol (no one is using them)
> 
> Please Leave a comment below!!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avengers Movie Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Discussions of PTSD, Greif

ONE WEEK BEFORE THE ANNIVERSARY OF BEN'S DEATH

Peter sat down and laid his head back on the couch. It had been an exhausting day. A movie night with his aunt is exactly what he needed. A small headache had started forming over dinner and he was hoping it would leave before the movie started. Shuri and he sat in blissful silence for a few moments. She’d gotten up and gone to get her tapestry from her room so now they both had theirs around their shoulders. 

The sounds of the floors below echoed in Peter's ears but didn't take over which was nice. The Avengers were in a private meeting with Secretary Ross. Tony did all meetings with Ross in a soundproof room which Peter appreciated. If the way Tony talked about the Secretary meant anything, Peter wouldn’t want to hear how loud their arguments got.

"Sorry if this is really awkward," Shuri said suddenly, "But uhm, with what happened at lunch, I just wanted you to know that you're not alone, or well I guess that your not the only person our age to deal with that. Tony said something about PTSD and just, I guess I deal with that too so you're not the only person under twenty five who has that and doesn't really feel like they're even old enough for it yet."

Peter stared at her for a few seconds. The idea that she had been through something that awful stung him.

"Sorry if that was weird or anything," Shuri muttered, looking back at her hands.

"No!" Peter said quickly, not realizing how long he'd left her without an initial response. "No, uhm, I really appreciate it, uhm wow, that means a lot. Not that you have uhm, have that problem or anything just, uhm, just thanks for telling me."

Shuri smiled at him, "Your welcome, I guess I figured you didn't really get to choose if I knew or not, so at least this way," she shrugged.

Peter nodded and forced himself to keep talking. "Thanks, uhm, yeah I guess everyone I know who uhm who has PTSD fought in the battle of New York, or in Sokovia and stuff. My friend MJ has had panic attacks before but I don't know, it's different. Not necessarily worse or anything just," Peter didn't finish his sentence either.

"I don't have panic attacks," Shuri's voice was soft, "I can't sleep when my brothers away though. I can't sit down either. I, uhm, I don't stop working when he's gone. On suits, on medical supplies to help him in case one of my worries came true."

“Tony does that,” Peter muttered, “He pretends he doesn't but Pepper and Rhodey have told me stories of what happened after he flew into the wormhole in New York and it was bad.” Peter thought for a second. “I kind of do that too,” he thought for a long second. Shuri gave him time. "How well can you keep a secret?"

Shuri looked at him odd. "You know I'm from Wakanda?"

Peter rolled his eyes, "How well can you keep a secret from your brother and Okoye?"

"Oh, uhm, well they still don't know I'm gay if that counts for anything." Shuri shrugged.

Peter smiled a bit, "Fair enough, I just," he sighed, "You know what, what the hell. This is ridiculously classified but I'm the only one who gets to declassify it. Are you okay with having a non-life threatening secret that Captain America doesn't know?"

Shuri looked at him weird, "Is this still about PTSD or have we moved onto something else?"

"It's still about, uhm, it's still about my PTSD, just like a really extreme uhm an extreme thing that occured because of it I guess. Wow I hate that I can probably technically classify this whole thing as an unhealthy coping mechanism. Are you good with a secret?"

Shuri thought for a second, "Not even my brothers guard? Is it something they should know?"

Peter shook his head. "Unless you get to a point where you think them knowing could literally save lives. I don't think his guard would keep it a secret from him and I think he would tell Captain America and Black Widow and stuff."

"Who knows?" She asked suddenly.

"My aunt May, Tony, Ned, MJ, Spiderman, Pepper, and Rhodey."

"Wow, uhm," she gave him an odd look."I can keep it a secret for you. What is it?"

Peter took a deep breath. "A few days before I, well before I watched my uncle die. That's uhm, that's where part of the traumatic part of the post-traumatic-stress is from. But a few days before that I-”

“I’m sorry that happened,” Shuri interrupted. “Sorry, I know you were getting going and sometimes it’s hard to stop but I thought I watched my brother die, and I- I’m really sorry.”

Peter watched her fiddle with the edges of her tapestry for a few moments. “Thanks, I’m, wow I’m, I’m sorry, is he okay now?”

Shuri gave a small nod, “He changed that week but a lot happened and a lot of people changed. Physically he’s okay though. You can keep telling me what happened, I’m sorry I stopped you.”

Peter thought for a moment before continuing, “Thanks, uhm, so a few days before Ben died, about a year ago, uhm, I was at a field trip for school, and a thing happened that I don’t understand enough for it to be worth it for me to try and explain it. But I changed, like physically things started changing in me. I had a fever for a few days but my asthma went away. It confused May and Ben, and it confused me as well but I didn’t tell anyone what had happened at the lab.

“I was stronger, and faster, and my hearing and sight couldn’t stop noticing things, and I felt better, and I would get this weird tingle in my neck if something bad was about to happen. And when Ben died I knew something was about to happen and I still just stood and watched it happen.” Peter felt himself start crying, and his headache persisted. “I- I had the whole guilt complex thing along with a lot of other problems, but uhm, I didn’t want anyone else to die because I stood still for too long. So I put on some sweatpants, found out that I could stick to walls, made some webs, and started fighting crime and protecting the little guy in Queens.” 

Peter stared at her terrified of her response. She was a smart woman. Like brilliant. But they’d just been talking about post traumatic stress disorder so Peter didn’t know if she would catch on right away. 

“Is that how you met Spi- Oh my GOD IT’S YOU!” She was nearly shouting at the end and Peter felt himself wince against the couch at the noise.

“Sorry!” She whispered harshly. “But it’s you right?” She kept whispering which Peter appreciated. “You’re spiderman?”

He nodded with a smile at her excitement. “I am.”

“And the whole thing started because,” She thought for a second, “Shit that sucks. Everyone glorifies it too, and it’s just.”

“It started out as a way to try to get rid of survivors guilt. It’s more than that now. Which is nice. But yeah, it started out that way I guess.” Peter leaned against the couch again, pulling his tapestry around him. 

“Wow, okay wow, so you oh my gosh so you made all that stuff and okay I feel less weird about you taking over all his designs and chemistry and stuff, and that makes so much sense as to why- Holy shit you’d already met my brother! You must have been out of your mind when he showed up at your door! Wow that’s really- Wait can you show me how you stick to things? Is it weird if I ask to look at the hairs from your hands under a microscope, that’s what you said it was right, did you feel those grow in?” She stopped herself looking embarrassed. “You just told me that this all started right when you were traumatized, I’m so sorry.”

“My friend Ned asked if I laid eggs. You’re not offending me at all. It sucks that that’s how it started, and Tony said it gave me one hell of a hero's complex, but it’s kind of exciting now.”

Shuri nodded excitedly, “So I’m allowed to entirely nerd out about- OH MY- Sorry I keep forgetting to not yell, oh my god you’re RealSpidey aren’t you?”

Peter couldn’t help the huge smile that came across his face, “I’m going to tell you what I told Ned. I’ll acknowledge your account on twitter if you can crack the code.”

Shuri smirked. “You already lost that bet.”

“What?” 

“You think you’re clever, but I’ve got you beat because you had a conversation with RealPrincess1999 several weeks ago and have been DMing her ever since.”

“Holy Shit WHAT?!” Peter yelled.

Shuri started laughing. “No wonder you were so hard to hack. Ned must be your guy in the chair then yes?”

Peter nodded dumbly, staring at Shuri.

“You really didn’t think that if you were really spiderman you might be tweeting an actual princess?”

“No, I- I’m kind of dumb,” Peter stared at her, “Wow, that’s awesome. Do you want me to tell you the code?”

“No!” She all but yelled, “I need to figure it out for myself.”

Shuri thought for another moment. “Give me a hint.” She said.

“Capitaliation has nearly nothing to do with the content. Stark was right to think about bases.” Peter answered. People are coming down though."

"How do you know?" Shuri looked around. 

"Super hearing,” Peter answered, “It sounds like Black Widow and Hawkeye are going towards the personal elevator. Vision is hard to track because he just kind of hums. Your brother’s talking to Tony and Wanda. I think that Steve is walking with them though.”

“Now you’re just showing off,” Shuri smirked. 

Peter shrugged, “I can’t do it with too many people so I take what I can get.”

Shuri thought for a moment. “Before Steve gets back, do you have any background in neurology or computer programming?”

“Ned hacked Starks suit for me once. So he does, I’m not that good though.”

Shuri nodded, “Can I email him a puzzle that I need solved? He might not get a lot of context.”

“If I tell him who it’s from he might pass out, but he would finish it faster. Steve’s going to be able to hear us soon.” Peter warned.

“They don’t know about anything right?”

“Right.” Peter nodded. “Just Tony.”

Shuri smiled, “Thanks for trusting me.”

Peter shrugged, “Thanks for being cool.”

“Adults coming in!” Tony yelled ahead of himself, “You can stop talking about us now!”

“May’s not here yet,” Peter called back, “So we can’t start the movie. She texted me about ten minutes ago that Happy showed up so it’ll still be a bit.”

“Thank you again for inviting my sister and I to the movie night,” T’Challa was saying to Steve as they walked into the room. “We truly appreciate the hospitality.”

“Anyone with a room here is invited to movie night.” Steve said with a smile. “And Peter I guess.”

“I have a room here!” Peter sat up straighter, aware that the blanket over his shoulders probably made him look like a kid.

Steve looked at Tony, “That’s his room?”

Tony nodded, “It’s better than him sleeping on the work couch when he stays late nights here.”

“Remind me where you found him again?” 

“He wouldn’t stop emailing me.” Tony gave an exasperated sigh.

Wanda rolled her eyes, “Peter how did he find you, because he’ll never give us a straight answer.”

Peter shrugged, “I designed a lot of stuff for spiderman.”

“You know Spiderman?” Captain America asked.

“Yeah,” Peter answered, “He’s an old family friend, he’s not traceable to me though, we made sure of that.”

Wanda smirked, “It’s very tempting to just take a peak into your mind to see who he is. But if he wants out of this new Accords bullshit then I don’t blame him.”

Captain America looked over to her. “I still think the kid deserves in if he wants it.”

“He will not want in.” Wanda said.

Tony walked back from getting a few glasses and a pitcher of water out for everyone. 

“But we won’t know unless we ask him will we?” Captain America asked. “He has that right to choose.”

Tony rolled his eyes but Wanda beat him to talking. “No smart sixteen year old with a secret identity is going to voluntarily give up any of the rights that are not currently trying to be forced away from them. We are signing things away Captain, things that will not be easy to get back. We’re fighting our best, but we can only do so much.”

“These boundaries can be pushed Wanda, the kid won’t be in any trouble if he stays in Queens.”

“These boundaries cannot be pushed equally Steve.” Wanda said pointedly. “You, Tony, and Clint may be american grown but Natasha and I are foreign grown weapons. I’m a danger to my enemies and people are looking for reasons to lock me up. We are not on equal footing right now.”

“Wanda people are scared of all of us. You’re no more worrying to them than-”

“I am Steve. I am more worrying to the white men of America if for no reason other than my heritage.”

“Well that’s not something the kid will have to worry about Wanda. The kids american, he’ll be better off out in the open.” Captain America turned to Peter, “He is American yes?”

Peter nodded

“See Wanda. He’d be better to sign.”

“He would be better not to Steve. American or not he is still more mutant than you are. More mutant than Barnes. People will fear him.”

“People fear all of us Wanda come on, people have been terrified of Tony and he’s the one who’s wanted us to sign since the beginning. I can’t believe you’re not with me on this one?” Captain America looked to Tony. 

“I refuse to let Spiderman think I sit on either side of this. I wasn’t planning on telling them but Peter’s gonna spill the beans so I don’t want the arachna-kid to know where I stand. I’m not pushing him either way. Sorry cap.”

Captain America seemed to take this in before continuing. “They won’t be any more afraid of him than they are of you or I Wanda.”

“They understand your strength Steve they will not understand the power to stick to walls as they do not understand the power to control energy. Mutants are treated differently. You have to recognize that you only count as a mutant because you were altered, not because you are weird.”

“You might be right,” Captain America said, “But I still think it’s his choice. Otherwise we’re forcing him to stay local indefinitely. Ross says it’s a one time deal.”

“What?” Peter asked.

“That will never be permanent.” Tony said. 

“That’s what you told me with the accords and Wanda, Clint, and Scott still ended up at the bottom of a-”

“The Accords did change, first of all, and second of all Ross will never lose an opportunity to try and force Spiderman out of his mask. He will push to get spiderman onto our agreements until Ross himself has died at the age of Sixty seven from a second stress-induced heart attack. So I’m sorry if I’m not worried about it. Besides, the kids staying low. I asked and he said he didn’t want to be in the big leagues yet. We’re not pushing him.”

“I’m not asking to push him Tony, only to-”

"Captain America suggesting you take a closer look at things counts as pushing." Tony answered.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Captain america asked.

"I disagree-" Peter started.

"Your opinion is not coming out right now Peter." Tony said.

"Why not?" Captain America countered, "Let the kid speak!"

"Nope. Spidey boys friend here does not-"

"What would he want Peter." Captain America asked. The room went oddly still.

"Who-at? What?" Peter wasn't ready for the attention.

"Do you think we should tell Spiderman both sides of the argument. Let him know that the avengers offer is still open if he signs."

"Or if he doesn't," Tony turned to Captain America. "Are you saying he either signs or can't help us out?"

"How is he supposed to travel Tony?"

"He could stay domestic. The United States has not yet said they’re opposed to unregulated vigilantes.”

“They might when they see a young powerful one who they have no control or understanding of.” Wanda said. “He does not want to push that line.”

Peter felt his phone buzz. May was calling him.

“Hey May,” He answered. The room turned to him before realizing what was happening and looking back at each other.

“Hey, did you tell Shuri?” 

“Oh, uhm, one sec let me get somewhere that’s not in the middle of everyone.” He moved out of the room as Tony and Captain America resumed their bickering. “Yeah, uhm, yeah I did, it kind of came up.”

“It came up?” May was confused but Happy laughed in the background.

“Uh, yeah, I- well yeah. We, can I just talk to you when you get here?” He asked hating how young he felt.

“Everything alright?”

“Uhm, better than earlier, I just can’t stop thinking about Ben today.”

There was a small pause, where Happy asked May what Peter had said. “Me too Petey, me too. I’ll be there in a few minutes okay?”

“Yeah, uhm, yeah tell Happy to drive faster,” Peter said.

“Will do, I love you kiddo.”

“Love you too May.” Peter smiled and hung up, sitting on his bed for a moment, allowing the silence to help his headache.

He laid down on the bed for a moment, not quite ready to face the responsibility of both being spiderman in a conversation way out of his league, and pretending that he wasn’t as invested as he was.

Peter laid down on his bed, only for a second to give himself some space before going back out into the living room. He wasn’t that tired. He just wanted to rest his head against the pillow for a few seconds.

May was shaking his shoulder which was not what was supposed to happen.

“Hmm? I’m awake, I’m awake. I promise.” Peter sputtered, sitting up a little too fast and nearly falling back to his bed.

“Hi,” May was laughing, “I hung up six minutes ago and you were already out cold Peter. Do you want to just go to bed?”

Peter shook his head, “It’s only nine, I’d wake up at like four and that doesn’t help anyone.”

May smiled, and Peter turned himself so he could lean into her. Neither of them could hug as good as Ben had, but they had grown used to hugging each other instead.

“You want to tell me why Shuri knows about Spiderman?” May whispered.

Peter shrugged, “We were talking about the way we coped with- May can we talk about this later? I’ve cried so much today and I just want to go watch a movie.”

May held him tighter, and kissed his forehead. “Yeah, we can go watch a movie. Do you know what it is tonight?”

“I think Natasha said that they’re running through a list of classics for Steve still. She said I’d like it today though.”

“Well that’s hopefully a good sign. How are your senses doing since you woke up? You have a headache?”

May was a witch. Or just really used to Peter’s bullshit. “Yeah I’ve had a little one growing since I woke up. It’s okay though really.”

“Alright, I’m trusting you on that. Tell me if it gets bad though okay?”

Peter nodded, “It’s not a migraine or a sensory thing, I think I’m just worn out.” He laid into her a bit more, not terribly wanting to leave.

“Have you been drinking water?” She asked, “Tony sounded like he’d forced a good amount of food into you at dinner.”

“He did, uhm, water might help some.”

“Alright, lets head out, you go find your spot on the couch next to your little science friend, I’ll text a picture to Ned and get him all jealous while I get you a water bottle. Sound good?”

Peter nodded, “Yeah that sounds good. She’s really cool May.”

“I should hope so, She knows more about you than MJ at this point.”

“May, MJ knows I’m Spiderman.” Peter looked up at her.

“Oh shit, I knew that, sorry. I forget the ones that don’t embarrass you.”

“May!”

“What?” She was laughing, “It’s easier to remember that Ned caught you on the ceiling than you awkwardly telling MJ in our living room.”

Peter stood up a bit. “Lets just go watch a movie,” he muttered.

“One more hug?” May asked as she stood up.

“Yeah, one more hug.” Peter answered. He pulled her in tight and tried his best not to wish Ben had his arms around them as well. “This weeks gonna suck.” He muttered.

“Yep.” May said, pulling away. “It’s going to suck so much, but we’ve got each other and that’s all we can ask for at this point.”

"Have you met them all then? Or did you come straight to my room?" Peter asked as they made their way to the living room.

"Straight to your room, Tony seemed worried that you hadn't come out. I think he generally assumes you've been kidnapped until proven otherwise."

Peter nodded, "That sounds about right."

Captain America walked down the hallway towards them and froze upon seeing May.

“Steve?” May asked. Peter whirled around and saw her staring at Captain America like she knew him. "Oh wow I didn't realize you were- and that- Wait a second you never called me. I had a good time, I thought we could get lunch."

"What?!" Peter asked her.

"Sorry, I uhm," Steve ignored Peter, "I don't have to good of a feel for technology yet. I'm figuring out work emails but texting is a bit of another beast. There's a lot of shorthands and they all mean very different things than the shorthand we used in the military."

"If you text me you can use full sentences, but I did want that lunch, and I don't see Kevin throwing another party like that one any time soon."

"No I don't think so either."

"Sorry, not sorry" Peter spoke up before anyone could keep talking, "But what the heck is going on here?"

"I met Steve at that weird birthday party I couldn't stop talking about a month ago. He's the guy I said was one of three good things to come out of it " May clarified.

"What were the other two?" Steve leaned back and his shirt stretched out against his muscles. 

May laughed, "They had good wine, and my coworkers owed me because I was the one who offered to take the gift from our department."

Steve laughed as well, "That's fair, I'm unemployed by some standards and still can't get drunk so you were probably the only good thing I got out of it."

"Okay what the actual heck?" Peter's head was swivelling between the two of them terrified. "Are you asking Captain America on a date right now?"

"No!" May and Captain America said at the same time.

"And kid you can call me Steve."

"I don't think you understand how much I cannot do that."

"Peter," May put a hand on his back, "We met at a party and got along. It's not a romantic thing, it's a friendship thing, and if he asks you to call him Steve you can call him Steve."

Peter stared at her for a bit before glancing back at Captain Steve who looked like he wasn't sure if he was supposed to find it funny.

"Why don't we go watch the movie," Captain Steve said, "Natasha said it's the first of eight and they're supposed to be good."

Peter felt his muscles physically relax at the idea of watching the first Harry Potter movie again. 

"Well that was the right thing to say, huh bug?" May asked Peter with a smile at Steve.

Peter nodded and May pulled him into a side hug before they walked together into the living room with a confused Steve behind them.

Luckily for Peter the rest of the introductions were not as exciting. May seemed to avoid T'Challa but the King didn't seem offended. She greeted Shuri with a smile and warned her that Peter drooled in his sleep. 

"He seems the type." Shuri had replied. 

May and Peter were curled up on the corner of the couch when Clint and Natasha made there way in with a DVD in hand.

"Steve you are about to be introduced to the wonderful world of Harry Potter."

"I've heard of that one," Captain Steve smiled. "It's where the Legolas joke comes from right."

Peter winced causing May to laugh. 

Hawkeye spoke up. "That's Lord of the Rings. This one's just wizards. Unfortunately no bows and arrows."

Captain Steve nodded but was obviously still confused. They started the movie and the adults must have rethought their decision to invite Peter and Shuri who both sang along, loudly, to Hedwig's Theme. May hummed with Peter, like she would when they would watch the movies with Ben. Peter had the tapestry draped around both of them, as Shuri did with her brother and their tapestry. Natasha’s legs were rested on Clints lap, and he spent most of the movie texting someone. Captain Steve was enthralled in the movie, and Wanda couldn’t stop watching either. Peter saw her playing with balls of energy throughout all the Wingardium Leviosa scenes and smiled. Even if it was fiction, she probably understood Harry’s wonder of the magical world better than any of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think in the comments!

**Author's Note:**

> The week leading up to the anniversary is told in chronological order with in Universe one shots of Peter, Ben, and May's lives placed in coordinated spots between the chapters. All chapters that belong to this fic are published in the fic, the one shots will be published here as well. All chapters are mostly finished, but because of the way it's drafted I'm open to new ideas for one shots that you would like to see!
> 
> Please leave a comment and let me know what you liked, and what you'd like to see! Also PLEASE let me know in future chapters if you ever get confused about when the scene takes place. I think it should be good, but I wrote the story so I'm really familiar with it.
> 
> THANKS FOR READING!!!


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